The Hills Have Eyes (2006)

[modage]

well thanks to a wicked case of bedbugs and having to evacuate my apartment for many hours yesterday i ended up seeing this as well though i figured it would probably be worth waiting for a rental.  so again, aja continues to infuriate.  he gets it right for the entire film except for the beginning.  i guess its better to have a suck beginning and then the film get good then have a good film and have the ending suck, so atleast he's making some headway.  but the first 30 minutes or whatever of the film are almost a complete waste of time.  its almost funny how much of a contradiction he is as a director because the way he stages things when the shit finally does hit the fan is so wild and unpredictable he really feels 'dangerous'.  like 'yes, i will do anything to hurt you, it can be quick, it could be anybody' which is a great quality to have as a horror filmmaker.  so its extremely unfortunate he also falls into the most predictable cliches like spending the entire beginning of the film executing about 50 fake scares.  there is no story or character development there is a brief introduction and 60 second intervals between the next BOO!  but the characters have no reason to be freaked out yet because nothing has happened to lead them to believe they should be in danger.  so even though we as an audience have more information it really just goes on for far too long. 

but when the shit finally does hit the fan it becomes an entirely different film and a pretty great one.  like i mentioned his way of doing things is one that makes you believe everybody could die, and thats the danger you want.  if you know who your heroes are the film is paint by numbers.  but having the chaos happen in a truly unpredictable way and the heroes emerge organically is just fantastic.  so pretty much the film is great from there to the end, (with the exception of one hero dropping a shotgun at the feet of a villain he's just dispatched.  by that point he DOES realize hes in a horror movie and theres no excuse for such stupidity in todays world.  i realize he's completely out of it by that point but really thats just lazy writing.)  the other problem with the film is just the story itself.  a family driving through the desert just doesnt seem as believable today.  i mean i guess it happens but it just seems like more of a 70s freewheeling thing then it does something that ANYbody today can relate to.  so its just something you've seen SO MANY TIMES before, crazy hillbillies in the middle of nowhere kill everyone passing through.  its just kitsch by this point.  and i'm not saying that the film needs to be like about the internet or something to be relevant today or that they should've tried to update this film, i'm just saying its existence as a remake of this story was flawed from the start.  but overall worth watching for horror fans.  the first 1/3 sucks, then he takes some things too far which you do feel are in poor taste, but by the end its worth it.  still better than most of the shit horror films out there today.  i guess i should also mention the audience i was with was pretty rowdy/terrible "Yeah! Kill all the white people!"  (not making that up), so i will have to see it again on dvd at which point i will undoubtedly enjoy it more.

sidenote mpaa rant: oh, are movie theatres worried about the box office?  hmmm... heres an idea, when a horror film comes along like this one where the director goes on record saying he had to cut a bunch of shit out and this isnt really his cut of the film, why do you expect me to spend 10x as much money to see a film in the theatre when the better version will be on dvd?  why am i paying more to see a censored version?  and especially in cases like this where it really is the DIRECTORS CUT not just extended with 5 more wacky minutes of unfunny shit!  now, just think of releasing two versions to theatres... R Rated (for pussies, useless) and UNRATED (too extreme!).  which do you think is going to start making more money?   by doing that you're taking away the power of the UNRATED: VERSION YOU COULDNT SEE IN THEATRES marketing tool which has been gaining enormous strength.  so, thanks but no thanks big brother, next time i'll wait for dvd.   

[MacGuffin]

The Hills Have Sequels
Anyone Craven more?

There will be a sequel to Fox Searchlight's recent horror remake The Hills Have Eyes. According to Fangoria, Wes Craven, director of the original and producer of the remake, is scripting the sequel with his son Jonathan.

"We want to continue the story of the miners," Craven revealed. "This time, a group of National Guard screw-ups come face to face with the mutants on their last day of training in the desert. We will take the audience underground [into the mines] as well. The studio, Fox Searchlight, wants the sequel out a year to the day after the last one, so we have to deliver our script in a matter of weeks."

Alexandre Aja, who is busy on The Waiting, declined to pen the sequel. "So my son and I decided to write it ourselves, and we are hard at work," Craven advised Fangoria.

The Hills Have Eyes 2 will film sometime this summer.

[MacGuffin]

MacGuffin's Rule For Making A Bad Horror Movie: If you are rooting for and want the 'hero' characters to die, you've succeeded. Hills followed this rule.

I had some high hopes for this because Aja was at the helm and although I hated the ending, I was impressed with High Tension. So I felt he could do for this remake what Zach Synder did for Dawn Of The Dead. Sadly and unfortunately, this was not the case. In fact, Aja seemed to move the horror genre backwards. The film is SO full of cliches and fake scares that this was like Bad Horror 101, where a character must slam the window hard unnecessarily when another character is looking at something of concern in the distance. These characters, both good and bad, are incredibly stupid; the only smart one was the dog. Moments that should be tense come off (un)intentionally laughable. For example, a woman has  been raped and bloodied, screaming at the top of her lungs (which she should have been doing to get her family's attention, but that's beside the point) and she is asked, "Are you okay?" The sister has half her brain blown out all against the wall, and she's told by the husband, "You're gonna be okay." This also brings me to how no one seems to die in this film. The mother has her stomach shotgunned, a force that tosses her across the trailer, and she's still alive. A mutant is blown up inside the trailer by the propane and he still is breathing and laughing long afterwards. How Can All This Be?

The real rape was done to Craven's original.

If someone is pissed about the spoilers, consider me doing you a service. Anyway, it's not like you couldn't see them coming a mile away.

[edison]

A mutant is blown up inside the trailer by the propane and he still is breathing and laughing long afterwards. How Can All This Be?

al-Zarqawi was hit by a two 500lb bombs and yet he was still alive. How can this be?

[matt35mm]

MacGuffin's Rule For Making A Bad Horror Movie: If you are rooting for and want the 'hero' characters to die, you've succeeded. Hills followed this rule.

I had some high hopes for this because Aja was at the helm and although I hated the ending, I was impressed with High Tension. So I felt he could do for this remake what Zach Synder did for Dawn Of The Dead. Sadly and unfortunately, this was not the case. In fact, Aja seemed to move the horror genre backwards. The film is SO full of cliches and fake scares that this was like Bad Horror 101, where a character must slam the window hard unnecessarily when another character is looking at something of concern in the distance. These characters, both good and bad, are incredibly stupid; the only smart one was the dog. Moments that should be tense come off (un)intentionally laughable. For example, a woman has  been raped and bloodied, screaming at the top of her lungs (which she should have been doing to get her family's attention, but that's beside the point) and she is asked, "Are you okay?" The sister has half her brain blown out all against the wall, and she's told by the husband, "You're gonna be okay." This also brings me to how no one seems to die in this film. The mother has her stomach shotgunned, a force that tosses her across the trailer, and she's still alive. A mutant is blown up inside the trailer by the propane and he still is breathing and laughing long afterwards. How Can All This Be?

The real rape was done to Craven's original.

If someone is pissed about the spoilers, consider me doing you a service. Anyway, it's not like you couldn't see them coming a mile away.

Thanks for letting me know; I was actually considering renting this.  Oh well.

[Pubrick]

mac's next recommendation: DON'T RENT NIGHT WATCH

[picolas]

BUY IT?

[Pubrick]

YES

[modage]

from the new EW...

Quentin Tarantino said "I'm excited about all of the horror movies that are coming out-- the explosion of ultraviolent horror movies.  The best movie I saw this year was the Hills Have Eyes remake.  I'm not a huge Wes Craven fan and I always thought the first one was overrated anyway.  The new one is really creepy and really good.  It eats apples off the head of the original!"

[ᾦɐļᵲʊʂ]

scarry movees rox!!111!!1!

Seriously, though... what scary movie hasn't been a disappointment lately?  What movies is QT talking about?