Transformer Movie???

[©brad]

goddamn did this suck. i know i'm pretty late to the conversation but i really have to get this out.

- bay is the only director i can think of who has no issue turning the magic hour on and off like a water facet. it could be pitch black or high noon, he doesn't give a fuck.
- the robots are waaaaaay too complicated. for all the zillions of movable parts that pivot back and forth, maybe 30 register. more than meets the eye indeed.
- the movie never stops for a breath. it's the cinematic equivalent of snorting an 8 ball and jogging in place for two hours. and in classic bay fashion the action is confused and exhausting, thanks to his stubborn refusal to cut to a wide shot or stop moving the camera so we can get a grasp on what the fuck is happening. after a while the shit just gets boring.
- sweet christ was there some bad acting in this, particularly voight and tuturro. but i must say i don't think shia is as much of a douche as y'all do. in fact i find him to be quite charming at times.
- as a kid there were few things i dreamt about more than having a transforming car as my buddy. one of the many missed opportunities in this trainwreck was to expand on bumblebee's relationship with shia's character, or at least get us to care one iota about any of these metallic behemoths. but p is right, at the end of the michael bay day they're nothing more than giant hunks of metal.
- was i drunk or did i hear a character cheer "this is awesome! way better than armageddon!"

i went in buzzed, completely prepared for some ridiculous bay moments and wanting nothing more to have fun and like it in a nostalgic, campy kind of way. mac i love you buddy but how you or anyone else could buy this piece of shit on dvd is beyond me.

[Ravi]

i don't think shia is as much of a douche as y'all do. in fact i find him to be quite charming at times.

I actually like Shia, and I've never understood the vitriol directed towards him.

[grand theft sparrow]

- the movie never stops for a breath.

I truly envy you for being able to block the memory of the backyard sequence.

[Kal]

I was just re-watching this on TV for like 15 minutes... until Optimus Prime said he saw the glasses on eBay and some stupid shit... this is so retarded I cannot believe it... then some hot blonde dumbass knows more about aliens and technology than the government... incredible