Roman Polanski Rape Victim Samantha Geimer on Tarantino, Polanski, and Why Apologies MatterBy Eric Kohn
February 9, 2018
via IndieWireGeimer has dealt with the aftermath of sexual assault for decades. A day after hearing Tarantino express his remorse, she spoke to IndieWire in an exclusive interview about the experience.Samantha Geimer contended with sexual assault in Hollywood long before the truth came out about Harvey Weinstein. In 1977, Geimer was 13 years old when Roman Polanski gave her alcohol and pills, then raped and sodomized her, in Jack Nicholson’s Hollywood home. In the midst of the ensuing media mayhem, he was accused of unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor and fled the country, never to return. Geimer reentered public life following the 2008 release of Marina Zenovich’s documentary “Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired,” and has testified that Polanski should be sentenced to time served rather than facing a new trial for the crime. In 2014, she wrote a memoir about her experiences, and has publicly forgiven him.
Most recently, Geimer resurfaced in the media in a roundabout fashion, when 2003 comments made by Quentin Tarantino on Howard Stern’s radio show resurfaced in which the filmmaker claims that Polanski “didn’t rape a 13-year-old. It was statutory rape… he had sex with a minor. That’s not rape.”
Geimer disagreed with the assertion, but took issue with the way her response was characterized online. In the midst of the backlash, Tarantino
issued a public apology for the remarks, and also called Geimer at her home in Hawaii. IndieWire reached her there the next day — first by email, then by phone — to discuss the ordeal, as well as her broader thoughts on the conversations taking place about sexual assault in the film industry and beyond today.
On Twitter, you said that your initial remarks about Tarantino 961417784201691136[/tweet]]were misconstrued[/b]. Set the record straight.[/b]
I did not call him out or slam him. When asked, I said he was wrong, as in incorrect, about what happened. I thought he knew better now, 15 years later, and did not expect that he would repeat that, because he would only make himself look bad. Okay, I said, “like an ass.” But the sentiment was that he certainly knows better. The wording that he assumed I wanted to be “raped,” I don’t know where that came from, but he never said that. What I was really trying to say to those who called is, I don’t care. I don’t care what anyone says, I’m not upset, this and worse has been happening to me for years. And mostly, I am aware that my rape is being used to attack him and I really don’t like that.
Did you expect him to reach out? No. I mean, not personally. I thought that was nice. What if I was really mad? He called to face it personally.
What did you discuss and what do you make of his response?I think he realizes that the things he said to be shocking involve an actual person — me — and he wasn’t thinking about that at the time. He felt bad about it. While I had him on the phone, I made him talk to me about some of his movies. Ha, ha. Didn’t want to waste that opportunity. He is sincere in his apology and I told him I felt my rape was being used to attack him by people who don’t care about what happened to me, and I do take offense to that.
So which movies did you ask about?I talked to him about “True Romance,” which is my favorite movie. I was just letting him know that it was one of my all-time favorite movies. I just found out my mom had never seen it, because she was like, “Wow, Quentin Tarantino called you!” So now I’m going to watch it with my mom. It was funny. He told me that he liked Roman’s early movie, “The Fearless Vampire Slayers,” that he’d seen it on TV. I was like, “Oh my god, I love that movie.”
Then I asked him about his upcoming movie, because I heard it’s about Sharon Tate’s murder. I was like, “That’s just freaking me out. I don’t know why. It sounds awful.” He said, “No, that’s not what it’s about. It’s about that time period and that year.” Although it certainly has nothing to do with me and I’m not sure quite sure why, but I was thinking, “Don’t make a movie about that!” I was happy that he could put my mind to rest on a completely random thing like that.
Generally speaking, how do you feel about the value of apologizing when people speak out of turn about sexual assault?I think apologies go a long way to help the person who was wronged and the person that is apologizing. I often say I don’t need them, but in truth, they always have a positive impact. He is under a lot more scrutiny than I am. If not for Roman and Quentin’s fame, nobody would be talking to me about any of this, so their words, actions and even apologies will always be glorified and criticized. Fame magnifies everything.
What was it like to receive an apology from Polanski?He wrote me a handwritten letter and said, “I’m sorry, it was my fault, not your mom’s fault, and I’m sorry for what you went through.” I was like, “Well, I knew that.” I felt like he was sorry the minute he got arrested. My whole life, I assumed, of course he’s sorry. I didn’t feel like I needed that. But then when he sent that apology, I could tell it made a big difference to my mom, and my husband, some of my friends, and my kids. It gave my mom some kind of relief. It was really meaningful to the other people around me who care about me, which then made it really meaningful to me. Anything that can make my mom feel better is something I’m grateful for.
Like I said about Quentin, I don’t need an apology, because I don’t care about what he said. Why should I, right? I don’t let that stuff bother me. But in actuality, I’m kind of wrong, because it seems that it is nice to have an apology. That one from Roman ended up being super-meaningful. Talking to Quentin, I know he just wasn’t thinking and I didn’t take it personally the way he was talking on Howard Stern. But then once I saw it in writing the next day, I realized, it did make me feel better. So, apologies — I think you should take them, even if you don’t want them.
How might you relate your experience to people who have been sexually harassed by public figures, but haven’t committed crimes?Well, I think if you’re going to apologize, you apologize to the person individually who you upset. I don’t think you have to apologize to the whole world, or everyone who you think might hire you. An apology is only for the person who you feel you’ve hurt and wants an apology. I’m not sure if that has a greater effect on a wider group of people but Quentin and Roman’s apologies were written straight to me. They weren’t like, “I’m sorry for all the people I’ve offended.” They were real apologies. When you have people trying to write apologies for you or help you take care of things like that, maybe you’re missing the point. Unless you’re not sorry. When Tarantino called, he was really just saying that was lame of him, and he felt like a jerk. I said, “I don’t need a public apology, but if you were to make one, I’d understand that.” When you’re in that business and so scrutinized, it’s hard to figure out.
Part of the challenge here is tone. Many people say things under the guise of jokes that can be seen as crossing the line, and sometimes they spiral out of control.I am one of those people who thinks that you can have humor about anything. I have a good sense of humor, and when people make jokes about me, I laugh. I think that people should just take their indignation and not watch people they find offensive. If you don’t think it’s funny, you don’t think it’s funny. You don’t have to apologize for making a joke unless you really screw it up. Apologies should be sincere. I don’t think we should apologize for stuff we don’t feel sorry for. All this nitpicking and attacking people is missing the point. It’s like, hey, could we have some equal rights over here? How about equal pay? Perhaps stop sexually harassing people at work? Instead, it’s all, “Quentin Tarantino made shitty jokes!” No, women, focus. It’s not all about celebrities and taking people down. Let’s be positive and move forward.
I think being spiteful and taking people down you don’t like them isn’t helping anybody. We all see what’s happening. If you’re not doing something positive, if you’re not making a difference, stop pretending you are. Just be like, “I hate that guy.” [laughs] I’m in a weird spot. I’ve been in this weird spot my whole life. People are like, “We hate Roman because of what he did to you.” I’m fine, I don’t want anybody to hate anybody, and you actually don’t give a shit about me. What bothers me is that people are attacking somebody else at your expense. Let’s throw your rape out there to attack Quentin Tarantino. That hypocrisy bothers me because I’m in that spot where that happens to me. This is just the way it goes, in my life anyway, and we all say stupid things.
The #MeToo movement has been based around women coming forward to share their stories of sexual assault and abuse. Where does that leave silent survivors? You were one for years.The #MeToo movement has done a lot of awesome things and made a lot of conversations happen, but if this gets turned into this weapon to take down Al Franken, or some Republican, or some Hollywood person, or Hollywood in general — that’s not what it’s for. It’s supposed to get people to rise up, not push people down. Things will always get misused like that, but we shouldn’t forget we’re here to make things better and demand change. I think if you’re a victim of sexual assault or a crime, do what you decide to do. Come forward, don’t come forward. Speak out about it, don’t speak out about it. It’s individual and nobody should be pressured or forced to be quiet or talk. You have to understand the consequences of your choices. If you keep quiet, then maybe that person does something else that’s bad. That’s not your fault. You don’t have to come forward to save somebody else. It’s the person doing the bad thing, it’s their fault.
If you don’t come forward, then it’s 40 years later, and you want people to believe you — people aren’t going to believe you. You have to understand that people aren’t going to believe what you’re saying is true when you decided not to talk about it when years later it could never be proved and charges could never be brought. So do whatever you want, but understand, there are consequences. Weigh all the potential costs and do what you want. Nobody should tell you did the wrong thing.
The climate surrounding these issues has become especially charged after the Harvey Weinstein story broke. What was your reaction to that piece when it came out, and how do you feel about the reverberations it has had over the last few months? I think I was as shocked as anyone that such terrible behavior was still going on in 2018. I guess I thought things had changed since the ‘70s and ‘80s. But I have been sad to see #MeToo being reduced to a tool to harm celebrities and politicians. Women deserve better than that and we should stand up and demand real change, not salacious headlines.
How do you think the aftermath of your experience with Polanski would have played out around the world if you were experiencing it today?Oh my God! I don’t want to even think about it. If our phone rang off the hook, we had photographers parked outside our house and had to leave town in 1977, I can only imagine what a nightmare it would be today. Perhaps more people would “side with me,” but I don’t think that would make it any better. It never made any difference to me what strangers thought. I knew what happened. Actually, I don’t think it would happen today. Teenage girls were very sexualized in the late ‘70s. Things are so different now.
In the past, you have spoken up about the danger of passing judgement on Woody Allen for a case in which he wasn’t convicted. Now, it seems unlikely that his new movie will get much of a release because the backlash has been so powerful.I think that our justice system and being innocent until proven guilty are more important than any one crime. It is not fair to try something in the court of public opinion. It’s not fair to demand the belief of people or ask them to hate, shame, and vilify others. Sometimes we don’t get justice, sometimes we don’t want it. To imply that your recovery lies in the hands of strangers who must act on your behalf is a very detrimental thing. We can all recover and heal no matter the circumstances and that comes from within. It is important to listen to everyone. Verdicts and consequences do not come on the front of a tabloid.
Polanski’s latest movie, “Based on a True Story,” has yet to be released. It’s hard to imagine that it would be welcomed by many moviegoers at this particular moment. What do you make of that shift in our culture?I think that we need to work on making the world a safer place for women and the vulnerable now. Putting energy into being angry about things that happened decades ago does not serve a positive purpose. I resent those who use my case to draw attention to themselves, and make stands I do not agree with. It is another type of violation. This glorification of victimhood and pain, rather than recovery and reconciliation, is just an ugly way to use those who have been already been harmed. I think we need to look just as closely at the media when considering whether or not we are being abused. Are you getting the truth out or are you getting an attorney some air time?
Anyway, I don’t think someone who has committed a crime should be forever banned for gainful employment or creating art. That’s just stupid. We are all free to make own decisions about what we see and purchase, we don’t need others forcing what they call their morals down our throats and making demands of us.
In the midst of the Tarantino backlash, some people fixated on his movies, and the way his female characters are often treated in brutal ways. How much do you think people should be concerned with more positive depictions of women and gender relations in the movies?If you think someone’s movies are sexist, violent, or if you don’t like that person, that’s your choice. If you don’t like it, don’t watch it. The bottom line is that we’re free people, we live in America, we can say or do what you want. If you don’t like something, you are not obligated to pay attention to it. Having said that, it’s nice when you see that there are more women directors and people trying to make a difference by giving women more empowered roles. That’s terrific and I’d love to see more of it. But in the end, nothing is for everybody, and that’s OK. It’s OK to say, “I don’t like that,” but you can’t be censoring people and blaming people for things that aren’t their fault because of the violence in their movies.
