Why, God, why?!? - Films That Should Not Get The Greenlight

[modage]

Naomi Watts exclusively stars in remakes now.

[Pubrick]

Naomi Watts set for 'Birds' remake

Naomi Watts exclusively stars in remakes now.

wants to be kidman.

[MacGuffin]

New 'Noon' on the clock at American Film Market
Source: Hollywood Reporter

Remake rights to the 1952 classic Western "High Noon," starring Gary Cooper and Grace Kelly, were acquired Monday at AFM by producer Mark Headley, actor Christopher Mitchum and their business partner, Toni Covington.

Rights were secured from actress Karen Sharp Kramer, wife of the late Stanley Kramer, producer of the iconic original about a town marshal forced to face a gang of killers by himself.

The newly formed Los Angeles-based High Noon Prods. is seeking a director and a star to play the lead and hopes to begin shooting early next year with a target budget of about $20 million, Headley said.

Mitchum, son of actor Robert Mitchum, worked on the Westerns "The Last Hard Men" with Charlton Heston and James Coburn in 1976 and "Rio Lobo" with John Wayne in 1970. He noted that he had wanted to remake "High Noon" for years.

Kramer confirmed the deal but declined to reveal its terms.

The original "High Noon" was written by John Cunningham and Carl Foreman and directed by Fred Zinnemann; it was based on pulp short story, "The Tin Star."

[MacGuffin]

'Metropolis' finds new life
Schuehly to remake sci-fi classic
Source: Variety

Producer Thomas Schuehly ("Alexander") has acquired the remake rights to Fritz Lang's "Metropolis" and is partnering with Mario Kassar on an updated version of the 1927 silent sci-fi classic.

The Munich-based Schuehly and Kassar are currently in negotiations with a number of top directors to helm the pic, with a final decision expected in the next few months.

Schuehly obtained the rights to the film from Vienna-based publishing group Sessler Verlag.

One of the most groundbreaking films in cinematic history, the influence of "Metropolis" is evident in classic works that have spanned the 20th century, from James Whale's "Frankenstein," "Dr. Strangelove" and "2001" to "Blade Runner," "Gattaca" and "The Matrix."

"With the overwhelming role technology plays in our daily lives, the growing gap between rich and poor, including the gradual elimination of the middle class, the story of 'Metropolis' is a frightening reflection of our society that takes place in an all too possible not too distant future," said Schuehly.

Considered one of the most expensive films of its time, pic is set in 2026 in a massive city-state characterized by its monumental skyscrapers and art-deco architecture.

The film, which is listed on the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Org's World Register as part of Germany's documentary heritage, depicts the class struggle between the wealthy society of planners and thinkers, who live in luxury high above the Earth, and the workers, who live underground, toiling to sustain the lives of the privileged.

Schuehly, has also produced such films as "The Adventures of Baron Munchausen" and "The Name of the Rose," as well as Oliver Stone's "Alexander."

Schuehly's production won't be the first remake of a German expressionist classic. In 1979, Werner Herzog created a modern classic with his adaptation of F.W. Murnau's 1922 vampire film "Nosferatu."

[MacGuffin]

'Bumped' is 'Breakfast' at an airport
Source: Hollywood Reporter

NEW YORK -- Veteran producer Bridget Johnson will produce "Bumped," a modern-day version of "The Breakfast Club," with McG protege Anna Mastro attached to direct from a script by Lizzy Weiss.

"Bumped" is a comedy-drama revolving around five twentysomethings -- including a corporate go-getter, a musician and a flirt -- who normally wouldn't be friends but who get to know one another when they're bumped from a flight and wind up stranded at Chicago's O'Hare Airport.

The project marks the directorial debut for Mastro, who worked closely with director-producer McG on his "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle" and was an associate producer on his "Stay Alive."

Mastro also has developed and produced the CW's "Pussycat Dolls" series and, like McG, shot music videos.

The film will be financed independently and later set up at a studio; it likely won't shoot until the SAG strike situation is resolved. Johnson ("As Good as It Gets"), who was an exec at Touchstone as well as at James L. Brooks' Gracie Films, produced the upcoming Miramax release "Smart People."

John Hughes' 1985 film "The Breakfast Club" (with which "Bumped" has no formal association) was a generation-defining comedy that helped build the careers of actors like Emilio Estevez.

[pete]

super weird - I was stuck at the Chicago airport for 22 hours last Friday, made friends with a bunch of people who were very different from each other and I remembered thinking, this would make a shitty sitcom.

[Sleepless]

McG protege Anna Mastro

There's a phrase that inspires optimism.

[MacGuffin]

Rosemary Remake Mulled

Shock Till You Drop reported that Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes company is in talks with Paramount to remake Roman Polanski's 1968 horror film Rosemary's Baby.

Dunes producers Brad Fuller and Andrew Form are currently looking for writers to tackle the material, which is based on Ira Levin's novel, the site reported.

The original film centered on a young Manhattan couple, played by John Cassavetes and Mia Farrow, and a pregnancy that turns into something more sinister.

[MacGuffin]

Bay preps 'Rosemary' redo
Source: Hollywood Reporter

"Rosemary's Baby" is in for a rebirth.

Paramount is in negotiations with horror shingle Platinum Dunes to bring back the classic for a new generation of moviegoers.

Partners Michael Bay, Andrew Form and Brad Fuller will produce the remake.

"Baby" was a best-selling novel by playwright-author Ira Levin ("The Boys From Brazil," "The Stepford Wives"). The book was adapted in 1968 into a much-loved Paramount movie directed by Roman Polanski that starred Mia Farrow, John Cassavetes and Ruth Gordon, who won an Oscar for her role.

The story follows a young couple who move into a gothic New York apartment, where they are befriended by their elderly neighbors. After the woman becomes mysteriously pregnant, she discovers that the neighbors actually are part of a coven of witches and that her husband has allowed her to be impregnated by the devil in exchange for a successful career.

No scribe is yet on board to write, and Platinum Dunes plans to be meticulous with the remake, knowing it has been entrusted with a jewel from the Paramount library.

Platinum Dunes already is working with Paramount, along with New Line, on a relaunch of "Friday the 13th." The company is in production on "Unborn," an original supernatural thriller being directed by David Goyer.

[MacGuffin]

Madonna wants to remake Casablanca - and of all the places in all the world, she plans to set it in war-torn Iraq
By CAROLINE GRAHAM; The Daily Mail

It is one of the greatest films of Hollywood's golden era, a triple Oscar-winning classic with electrifyingly charismatic stars and a script bursting with memorable lines.

But now Madonna has stunned the movie industry with plans to remake Casablanca – and this time set it in Iraq.

The singer, whose previous film career has been littered with critical and commercial turkeys, is also planning to take the lead role of Ilsa Lund, which originally made a star of Ingrid Bergman.

A source at a major Hollywood studio that was recently approached by the 49-year-old star said: "She is still determined to make it in the movies.

"She and her representatives have been touting around a project which is a remake of Casablanca. The reception has been lukewarm to say the least. No one can understand why she wants to redo what many people consider the greatest film of all time."

In the 1942 original, Bergman starred opposite Humphrey Bogart, who played Rick Blaine, a cynical bar owner in the Moroccan city of Casablanca in the early days of the Second World War. Ilsa is torn between love for her husband, a Czech Resistance leader, and her ex-lover Rick.

Madonna is said to believe the film will make her reputation as an actress, after a string of high-profile flops such as Shanghai Surprise, Body Of Evidence and Swept Away, her much-derided 2002 collaboration with husband Guy Ritchie.

The source said: "Madonna is talking about taking the Ingrid Bergman role for herself, even though Bergman was in her 20s when she played Ilsa and Madonna is nearly 50.

"She wants to update the story and maybe set it in a modern war zone such as Iraq. There is no script yet.

"Madonna and her people are testing the waters to see if this is the right vehicle for her and if a major studio will get behind the project."

The movie, which regularly tops lists of the greatest films ever made, includes the classic song As Time Goes By and memorable quotes such as: "Here's looking at you, kid", "We'll always have Paris" and "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world she walks into mine".

But one of the lines most closely associated with Casablanca – "Play it again, Sam"– is a misquotation. In fact, Ilsa says: "Play it once, Sam, for old times' sake. Play it, Sam." Later, Rick says: "You played it for her and you can play it for me. If she can stand it, I can. Play it!"

Bollywood filmmaker Rajeev Nath is also said to be working on a remake set in India, calling it "a tribute to the original".

A spokeswoman for Madonna refused to comment.

And here's how she might 'improve' the classic script

Of all the Kabbalah meetings in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.

Here's looking at you, kid. Now who do we have to pay to adopt him?

We'll always have Basra... I think this is the beginning of a beautiful fitness regime...

I stick my neck out for nobody - just in case they see the wrinkles.

It doesn't take much to see that Saddam's Weapons of Mass Destruction arsenal didn't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.

If you watch this remake, you'll regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.

[Kal]

Madonna wants to remake Casablanca - and of all the places in all the world, she plans to set it in war-torn Iraq
By CAROLINE GRAHAM; The Daily Mail

It is one of the greatest films of Hollywood's golden era, a triple Oscar-winning classic with electrifyingly charismatic stars and a script bursting with memorable lines.

But now Madonna has stunned the movie industry with plans to remake Casablanca – and this time set it in Iraq.

The singer, whose previous film career has been littered with critical and commercial turkeys, is also planning to take the lead role of Ilsa Lund, which originally made a star of Ingrid Bergman.

A source at a major Hollywood studio that was recently approached by the 49-year-old star said: "She is still determined to make it in the movies.

"She and her representatives have been touting around a project which is a remake of Casablanca. The reception has been lukewarm to say the least. No one can understand why she wants to redo what many people consider the greatest film of all time."

In the 1942 original, Bergman starred opposite Humphrey Bogart, who played Rick Blaine, a cynical bar owner in the Moroccan city of Casablanca in the early days of the Second World War. Ilsa is torn between love for her husband, a Czech Resistance leader, and her ex-lover Rick.

Madonna is said to believe the film will make her reputation as an actress, after a string of high-profile flops such as Shanghai Surprise, Body Of Evidence and Swept Away, her much-derided 2002 collaboration with husband Guy Ritchie.

The source said: "Madonna is talking about taking the Ingrid Bergman role for herself, even though Bergman was in her 20s when she played Ilsa and Madonna is nearly 50.

"She wants to update the story and maybe set it in a modern war zone such as Iraq. There is no script yet.

"Madonna and her people are testing the waters to see if this is the right vehicle for her and if a major studio will get behind the project."

The movie, which regularly tops lists of the greatest films ever made, includes the classic song As Time Goes By and memorable quotes such as: "Here's looking at you, kid", "We'll always have Paris" and "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world she walks into mine".

But one of the lines most closely associated with Casablanca – "Play it again, Sam"– is a misquotation. In fact, Ilsa says: "Play it once, Sam, for old times' sake. Play it, Sam." Later, Rick says: "You played it for her and you can play it for me. If she can stand it, I can. Play it!"

Bollywood filmmaker Rajeev Nath is also said to be working on a remake set in India, calling it "a tribute to the original".

A spokeswoman for Madonna refused to comment.

And here's how she might 'improve' the classic script

Of all the Kabbalah meetings in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.

Here's looking at you, kid. Now who do we have to pay to adopt him?

We'll always have Basra... I think this is the beginning of a beautiful fitness regime...

I stick my neck out for nobody - just in case they see the wrinkles.

It doesn't take much to see that Saddam's Weapons of Mass Destruction arsenal didn't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.

If you watch this remake, you'll regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.

If this really happens... there will be blood!

How can they fucking consider this? The only way it could make money is if people want to see how retarded this woman and her stupid remake are... and even then what is the fucking point? I hope this is bullshit because from all the stupid remakes and all the stupid hollywood actors this is by far the worst possible scenario.

[modage]

early April Fools prank?

[cron]

madonna is an evil force that must be stopped.

[Gold Trumpet]

I say remake it. A bad Madonna adaptation will be dependent on the plot structure of the original. It will show some people that the original wasn't based on any ingenuity at all. You remake Buster Keaton's Sherlock Jr. and you still have an excellent idea for a film, but with Casablanca you have a film that exists as a classic through no talent of its own. The film is technically awful but beloved because of public lore.

[pete]

you're wrong again.  just because you can't like the movie due to your own failure to write about it doesn't mean the rest of people who love it are idiots.