Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of The Sith

[Stefen]

Geek mode on/

Spoilers....
Ranking the Jedis and Siths.

1. Darth Sidius - don't think anyone could had brought him down in a pure one-on-one battle. The duel with Mace seemed like an act of deception to get Anakin to join the Dark Side. And Vader only got to kill him when he wasn't paying attention. The emperor probably never fully taught Vader every secret of the Dark Side, so Vader never advanced beyond the emperor's level.

2. Yoda - he's a notch below Sidius. I don't think we got to see how great he really was in his youth before he was way past his prime. The little man held his own in every duel. He's a heavyweight and like a lightning ninja and harks back to his prime with badass reflexes and agility when he has to put the boxing gloves on, then it's back to the walking stick and reading books.

3. Luke - skillwise, he's not really the most awesome ever. how the hell did he jump so high though? well, despite his inexperience and raw abilities, he beat Vader in ROTJ. He then got his ass whooped by the emperor though, so he's not thaaat great yet. Not even Yoda faced that kind of one-sided beatdown torture, so Luke's below those two masters. Maybe he eventually became the greatest jedi ever later on, but we don't know yet. episodes 7-9 haven't been told.

4. Darth Vader - He's the "chosen one" and he should had been the greatest jedi ever, but I put him below Sidius because he just wasn't badass enough to beat him. If he had the power, he would had destroyed the emperor a long time ago by himself. But he even asked Luke to help him in his quest to overtake the emperor in Empire. The emperor was like a redneck husband to vaders housewife self. He would give him a texas sized (mental) beatdown whenever he stuck up for himself or showed any kind of independance.

And I place Vader below Yoda because I just don't really see a prime Yoda being that much weaker than Sidius.

And Luke is ranked higher than his dad because, well, he whooped his dad's ass convincingly.

5. the Count - thought he was on par with Yoda in episode 2, but then Anakin kicked his ass and chopped his head off in Revenge of the Sith. He did crush Obi Wan twice though.

6. Mace - gave Sidius a run for his money. But really went out like a broke ass chump.

7. Obi Wan - not the greatest fighter. what he lacks in skill he makes up for in patience and understanding. He beat Darth Maul and Anakin even though those two were supposedly stronger than him. Hes got the most heart out of all of them, something I feel jedis lack.

8. Darth Maul - he had mad skills, but then got too cocky. he died like a bitch taking a smoke break. just lost his focus for a second, but that was enough to send him to defeat.

9. Qui gon - Obi Wan's master gets some respect. he's supposedly better than Obi Wan, but Obi Wan, the apprentice, was the one that beat the guy that killed Qui gon. He was kind of all talk, in episode 1 when he has to fight darth maul right before leaving tatooine he almost runs out of breath and then conjures up a jedi second wind and jumps onto the plane, where he sits on his ass gasping for air and then tries to change the subject by introducing Anakin to Obi Wan, something a Jedi should have foreseen not to do.

Geek mode off/

[Myxo]

I still can't get over a name like Count Dooku..

[nix]

Wasn't going to go to the midnight show. Wanted to go alone on thursday afternoon and judge the movie on it's own merrit, without the geek anticipation beer goggles I had with eps 1 and 2.

But a girl I have a giant fucking crush on asked me to go, so...

In short, it stands as the best in a really shitty trilogy. Nothing I can say that hasn't already been said a few times.

But I'm proud of myself. Even with the army of blind followers surrounding me, I was able to judge the movie by what was on screen. And it's nowhere near Empire, or New Hope really. It's in the same stratosphere as jedi, but the vader/emporer/luke battle is better than anything in this movie.

And so, I'm thankful that this one was less shitty than the other prequles, but that's about as far as it goes.

[MacGuffin]

watching this movie made me feel like saying, "NAH! BOO!"

get it?

You're Bantha fodder.

[RegularKarate]

SPOILS

I saw it last night and I'm still weighing out how much I liked it in my head.

The good stuff was great... it's obviously the best of the prequels... the design... oh my lord, the design was so awesome... the only thing consistant throughout all of the prequelogy... so beautiful, brings us there in a perfectly smooth transition.  You can almost tell things about who is going to join the rebelion and who is going to bow to the empire by what vehicles they use.  So good.

The only emotional scene that has worked in this entire new batch was at the end with Anakin and Obi-Wan... where Obiwan is telling him how effed up it is that he betrayed everyone and how much he loved and trusted him... you can actually tell he feels this (Lucas let him act), you can see it in his eyes... then Vader just says "I hate you"... Fuck... that's where the movie should have ended.

Lots of shit too... the Vader howl was the worst... it mad me sad.  Yoda fighting too much (nice Pandering, George).  Wookie battle not as cool as was needed (if you would have told a twelve year old RK that he would get to see Yoda bring clones to aid a planet of wookies in fighting the droids... tears of joy).  Lots of other stuff too.

-the jedis are being hunted, so yoda says goodbye to chewbacca and the other chewbacca thing, the chewies are left staring at each other and "talking" in their language, but it's just HOWLS to us of course, like two bobcat goldthwaits. fuggin HILARIOUS.

You didn't mention the funniest part about this.... it's almost EXACTLY the goodbye scene in E.T.... even the score starts sounding like E.T.  HA!  I can't tell if George did it for a laugh or if he thought "E.T. made them cry... let's do that".

Now the questions for the more hardcore geeks... How come whenever a clone took of his helmet, his head was all cg and shakey?  At first I thought 'well, it's because there's a bunch of them and they all look alike, so you can't shoot them all at the same time', but then there is at least one scene where it's just one clone and he head is all wobbley and pasted on.  Did George forget that they should all be Jango and have to do a cut and paste later?

[nix]

doubt he forgot. As much as he jerks off to fx, I figure he did it because he could.

[MacGuffin]

'Star Wars' grosses record $50 mln in first day

The final chapter of the "Star Wars" movie saga grossed $50 million from its first 24 hours in North American theaters, a record opening-day box office tally, according to estimates released on Friday by studio 20th Century Fox.

"Star Wars: Episode III -- Revenge of the Sith," the last installment in the six-part epic George Lucas launched nearly 30 years ago, surpassed the previous first-day box office record set by "Spider-Man 2," according to Exhibitor Relations Inc.

[w/o horse]

$50 million in one day.  $50 million in one day.  You guys should try saying this.  Hell, say it out loud, "Fifty fucking million dollars in one goddamn day."

That's incredible.  Not surprising, but absolutely incredible.

Edited for further accentuation.  Holy God.

Okay.

[nix]

at my current earning rate, I could live for 66.6 years (or the rest of my life) on one fiftieth of what this film grossed in 24 hours.

Just something to ponder while eating your burrito supreme.

[Myxo]

Here is a printable form that geeks can turn in to their boss to get out of work and see Episode III.

[tpfkabi]

i agree that it was easily the best of the prequels. there were a few chill bumps moments when you knew it was about to go down. in the end though, we knew the fate of the main characters, so we knew who wouldn't die. there were a few of Darth's and Palpatine's lines that sounded a bit cheesy. i'm not talking about the content of what they're saying, but how they expressed it.

about CGI clone:
i think the body seemed too small to be that actor's. for some reason i guess George wanted the clones to be thinner.

did anyone watch it on a digital screen?
i just wondered about the extra scene.

[Kal]

AMAZING

I'll post more about it later cause I'm in a hurry, but damn it was better that what I expected... and 50 mil in a day... makes me happy. Not that these fuckers need more money really, but they deserve it anyway.

[bonanzataz]

watching this movie made me feel like saying, "NAH! BOO!"

get it?

You're Bantha fodder.

yeah, yeah, wouldn't be the first time somebody said that to me. thing is, i am such a fan of the originals and i was very let down by these movies.  barring any expectations i may have had because of the originals, as a trilogy, these prequels just do not work. episode I at least kind of had a sense of playfulness and fun to it, and they blended puppets, live action, and cgi so well. it really seemed like lucas was excited to tell the story, even if the movie itself wasn't so hot. also, episode IV puts so much into its core group of characters. the original trilogy is so successful b/c you want to spend two more movies with these characters. lucas made the mistake of having the entire episode I revolve around a little boy anakin skywalker, and that little boy had to be jake lloyd, just another annoying child actor with no distinctive qualities to write home about. then you have jar jar binks, who would have had a much bigger part and been one of the core characters of this trilogy had audiences not hated him so much. lucas banked a lot on people liking jar jar, but jar jar was just fucking annoying (i kind of like jar jar, but only because of the south park episode jakovosaurs). the acting in episode I is bad, yes, but not nearly as bad as it was in episodes II and parts of episode III. this is because lucas actually used some sets and puppets and real people in episode I. of course acting is going to be stale if you have to act against empty space in front of a green screen.

so lucas realized he made a few mistakes and tries to pander to the audience just a little bit with episode II. only a tiny bit of jar jar and a grown up anakin, but now the core characters have changed. the movie could have spent more time developing the characters a little more and trying to give us a reason to like hayden (who just fails to emote as an actor), but instead, it just builds up the empire's plot to take over and gives us dazzling computer graphics. a few scenes try and show how amidala and anakin fall in love, but it's already been said that these scenes were not treated with care. i don't believe that these people are in love.

so we get to episode iii. by now, i don't care about the characters, i'm slightly confused about the plot for the empire to take over the universe (which is surprising condisdering how much time is spent on this aspect), and i'm completely aware that the whole thing is just shot on a digital soundstage - just computer worlds that animators must have busted their asses off to make. i can't suspend disbelief b/c computer animation will always look like computer animation. while the jawas in empire may have moved funny b/c they were animated using stop motion (i think. i'mm just baffled as to how they did any special effects in the originals. and didn't that used to be the point of big special effects movies?), but the puppets were made of real hair and if you shot a close up of them, it looked real, not digital. but i'm digressing, as i really want to get to how the fundamentals of the story blew, not the aesthetics. basically, i hated anakin since episode i, hated him even more when he became hayden in epii, so when evil threatens to destroy him, i just don't give a fuck. i don't feel the burden that i felt when evil almost destroyed luke in episode VI. i wasn't wowed or moved emotionally at all because i just didn't care (except for when anakin is burning and obi wan tells him how disappointed he is. that kind of got to me). and i didn't understand why anakin goes to the dark side when he sees how much of an asshole palpatine is after mace windu is thrown out the window. why does he turn on the jedis with such ease if he's been learning the jedi ways since he was 8? b/c he wants to save amidala? please. granted, i was pretty high when i saw the movie, so maybe it makes sense, but if that is the explanation then it's pretty lame.

a lot of people try to make the argument that the original trilogy was cheesy as well and the acting was just as stale. if that's the case, then i just can't understand why when i watch the originals today, i am in shock and awe and nearly in tears EVERY time the death star is blown up, EVERY time it is revealed that vader is luke's father, EVERY time han is frozen in carbonite. those movies make me feel so emotional while the new ones make me feel nothing. it's poor storytelling and an attempt to cash in on people's loyalty to the series and it stinks.

i hope people read this long post and i hope it opens you all up to tell me how much i suck and explain to me what i'mm not getting.

[picolas]

i hope people read this long post and i hope it opens you all up to tell me how much i suck and explain to me what i'mm not getting.

no, you're right. that post actually makes me want to rent episode one because i agree with you so much about everything else you said and i haven't seen it in years. i hate how people rationalize the suckiness of the prequels by deciding the originals were bad.

***spoils[/b][/color] including script excerpts (thanks, http://www.imsdb.com/scripts/Star-Wars-Revenge-of-the-Sith.html)

this wasn't a good movie. it had a few good moments.
- War!
- the first shot
- sideways elevator adventure
- the long moment when Anakin contemplates his situation and Palpatine while watching traffic.
- the silence/breathing after the mask goes on.
- Anakin without legs, Obi-Wan's reaction
- Padme's funeral
- the score, which deserved a better movie.

some of the moments were even great, but mostly because/if they were connected to the original trilogy. unfortunately, they were also lost in a sea of badness. Yoda's grammar is more messed up than in any other Star Wars, and it reflects the confusion in the writing pretty well. he was so eloquent in Empire. "That is why you fail." beautiful. now we have this:

YODA: Destroy you I will, just as Master Kenobi your apprentice will destroy.

i'm with bonanzataz on the thing that was absolutely key to Episode III being good. i don't completely understand/believe Anakin turning to the dark side. up until Windu's death, it seemed like there was going to be some really amazing, complex deception. he was getting pushed around by everyone, he was making decisions he was unsure about (Dooku), but after Palpatine made it clear he was the bad guy when he destroyed Mace, Anakin had NO REASON not to know right from wrong. he even said "what have i done?" moments before deciding to call Sidious his master. the best i can figure now is he was a confused teenager who wanted to save his wife.. the decision to go to the dark side moments after Mace's death is way too sudden and conflicted for him to truly believe the Jedi are bad. his only clear motivation is saving Padme, but he never gets the powers he needed and she dies.. so why does he remain so loyal in the next episodes? he was willing to sacrifice his good self to save her. why stay bad after she's gone, even if it means Palpatine killing you? and then she's never mentioned again.

there were parts where i clutched my forehead in disapointment, but i've forgotten them already like a bad dream.

y'know what would've been ASTOUNDING? if right near the end, the special effects team went back to models.

RK's right about ET. the part of me that didn't care about anything anymore at that point wanted Yoda's pod to blast into the sky and make that ET spaceship-rainbow.

funny things:
- Obi-Wan opening a door with a button, then closing it with the force.
- Obi-Wan standing in the door of the ship just before the Padme choking. it had the rhythm of an alanthebox movie.
- the idea of people building buildings on a lava planet.
- DARTH SlDIOUS: I have waited a long time for this moment, my little green friend. At last, the Jedi are no more.

YODA: Not if anything I have to say about it, Lord Sidious.

YODA uses the Force to throw DARTH SIDIOUS back,

and Sidious knocks over this really big, bulky chair. it was like the finest America's Funniest Home Video ever. it was  the most amazing physical comedy. an old man in a hood falls backwards over this giant chair. i can't explain it in words.

- PADME: Anakin, all I want is your love.

ANAKIN: Love won't save you, Padme. Only my new powers can do that.

i watched the New Hope commentary recently and Lucas was surprisingly still very  knowledgable and insightful about why it's so amazing. one thing he brought up, which i never thought about as a kid and forgot with the prequel trilogy was his intention that the audience would be thrust into a place where they don't quite know what's happened before and no one takes any time to explain how everything works or why the empire is in control or whatever. giving episode IV, V, and VI a context negates that wonderful premise. that mystery is part of what made Vader such an awesome villain.

i wish he had stayed that awesome.

[Myxo]

The movie does struggle to make a connection with dialogue. However, I think it works despite that shortcoming.

Personally, I think they could have made Episodes 1 & 2 a single movie. Then take Episode III and make it two parts. I was disappointed by the quick sequence of Jedi dying toward the end. It seemed very rushed and I felt like we could have made more of a connection with all of them given more time.

Padme: "I've lost the will to live!"

Terrible..

It's still great though. It is a spectacular feast for the eyes and ears.