weak end b.o. re cap 2/13-2/16

[atticus jones]

so...

1) 50 first dates...tagline..."imagine you have to win over the girl of your dreams every friggin day"...hmmm...where to begin? if you have to make a movie about dating the same skank 50 times must you choose drew? please people...this is torture...i wouldnt wanna watch sandler wooing drew one time in a row let alone fifty...and i friggin loathe the word friggin...next
2) miracle...a miracle this got made...a miracle its at the top of the box office...and a miracle kurt russell hasnt been banned from acting after blue streak and vanilla sky to name jus the recent gems...i do love him storming outta the locker room in the trailer tho...
3) barbershop 2:back in business...sum one shuda yelled cut long before this barbershop opened...i generally hate any title with the numba 2 in it and i go on the record as sayin that black in business would have been a better tagline...
4) you got served...a pile of regurgitated shit...the only breakin during this waste of two hours is my heart...j boog and lil fizz on a cast list spells dubba trubba...
5) butterfly effect...tagline "change one thing, change everything"...i couldnt agree more...change kutcher for ??? (insert most any actor here) and everything changes for the better...hell, two directors couldnt make the effect work...whats next?...no director?, three directors?, me directing?...sorry melora...i love you but cant help you on this one...
6)catch that kid...a remake of the danish "klatretosen"...is it jus me or has anyone else asked themselves what the phluck a danish remake for kids is doing in the top ten?...i did sum research on this one and found that "klatretosen" is a norwegian over the counter medication for infantile rectal bleeding...seems to be working here as well...our poor children...innocent cine minds and souls being warped by this poison...
7)along came polly...and a breath of fresh air...while phil was puffin anyway...not quite enough to sustain me but ya know...woulda been better if the emphasis was more on a long come of polly and less on the same song of lolly dada bladda blah blah...
8 ) lord of the rings:return of the king...was i the only one who hoped peter jackson had worked his cgi magic to bring elvis back in this one?...it was ha bit long but then again so is my johnson...cheap...i know...
9)mystic river...the only mystery here is why this has fallen outta the top spots in the box office...drink from this rivers cup and you shall thirst no more...
10)cold mountain...cold indeed at the bottom of this list but the mountain made from this mole hill is worth a climb...a nomination for renee? ok ...i guess...did she get undressed?...i mus stop now before i digress...

pee on you at the movies

[Finn]

What did you expect? It's the beginning of the year.

[mogwai]

atticus delivers once again and we didn't even ask for a top ten review. keep up the good work!

[pete]

whoa we got a lewis black on this board.

[RegularKarate]

Lewis Black posts here too?

Awesome list AtJo!

[cine]

Take a seat, Gene Shalit... atticus jones is here.

[Sleuth]

This should be done at least monthly

[modage]

This should be done at least monthly

mention Gene Shalit?

[Sleuth]

Whoops, I meant to post that in the Drink Piss For Good Health thread

[Chest Rockwell]

This should be done at least monthly

mention Gene Shalit?

How did he ever become so popular?

[bonanzataz]

uhhh, just look at him. how could he NOT become popular?

[sickfins]

is jones still on top of this game?  or are the flicks to be blamed for the bee/eh plus performance

yeah i think we best wait for the golden days of summer

tell me oj, tj's punishment is imminent...whether this is tolerable depends...are you planning on taking the role of the performer's savior a second time before he gets hit by another marvel truck

how's my driving? call 1-800-houdini

[phil marlowe]

wait a minute...did hollywood just release a remake of a one year old danish shit film?

what the fuck??