Bad movies should be forgettable, but for some reason they are so bad they stick in your mind for long after. That reason could be the terrible dialogue. What are some bits of dialogue that have stayed with you and pretty much sum up how horrible the movie is with these lines? Or are there lines from a favorite movie of yours that just make you cringe when you hear them and damper that part of the film for you?
I'll start us off with the prose from the film "Volcano":
Kids are playing rock, scissors, paper.
Kid 1: I win. Rock beats scissors.
Kid 2: Nuh, uh. I'm lava.
Kid 1: What beats lava?
Gabby Hoffman (dramatic pause; heroically): My dad.
Padme: We used to come here for school retreat. We would swim to that island every day. I love the water. We used to lie out on the sand and let the sun dry us and try to guess the names of the birds singing.
Anakin: I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth.
Anakin: Are you an angel?
Queen Amidala: What?
Anakin: An angel. I've heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They're the most beautiful creatures in the universe.
Queen Amidala: You're a funny little boy. How do you know so much?
Anakin: I listen to all the traders and star pilots who come through here. I'm a pilot, you know, and someday I'm going to fly away from this place.
Quote from: redlumAnakin: Are you an angel?
Queen Amidala: What?
Anakin: An angel. I've heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They're the most beautiful creatures in the universe.
Queen Amidala: You're a funny little boy. How do you know so much?
Anakin: I listen to all the traders and star pilots who come through here. I'm a pilot, you know, and someday I'm going to fly away from this place.
Shit beat me too it.
Does anyone have the scene from Signs where the military recruiter is talking to Joaquin Phoenix about baseball?
Colonel Tom Edwards: Why is it so important that you want to contact the governments of our earth?
Eros: Because of death. Because all you of Earth are idiots!
Jeff Trent: Now you just hold on, Buster.
Eros: No, you hold on! First was your firecracker, a harmless explosive. Then your hand grenade: you began to kill your own people, a few at a time. Then the bomb. Then a larger bomb: many people are killed at one time. Then your scientists stumbled upon the atom bomb, split the atom. Then the hydrogen bomb, where you actually explode the air itself. Now you can arrange the total destruction of the entire universe served by our sun: The only explosion left is the Solaranite.
Colonel Tom Edwards: Why, there's no such thing!
Air Force Captain: Visits? That would indicate visitors!
- From the Best Worst Movie Ever
Absolutely ADORE that film!
"Well one thing's for sure: Inspector Clay is dead. Murdered. And SOMEONE's responsible..."
and
"Your stupid minds! Stupid!... Stupid!"
and
"It is interesting when you consider that the living - who can think, are so afraid of those who cannot: the dead..."
As for my own, I'd have to go with Jurassic Park 3. William H Macy absolutely napalming his credibilty...
(I'm paraphrasing here)
-START OF SCENE-
WILL H: Son: you remeber when we were back home and we used to... go fishing?
SON: Yeah. I do, pop...
WILL H: Yeah... (sighs)... I love fishing.
-END OF SCENE-
[/b]
anything that has been uttered from the mouth of keanu reeves
Celeste: What's your name?
Scottie: Scottie.
Celeste: Who are you?
Scottie: I don't know.
Celeste: So, you have amnesia?
Scottie: Maybe.... what's amnesia?
Celeste: Loss of memory.
Scottie: I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure I do.
Celeste: Is there anything that you remember?
Scottie: My name.. Scottie.
Celeste: What about your last name?
Scottie: Yeah... No.. Where am I?
--------------------
days of our lives.
doctor: we've found something. in your head. were going to have to operate on your brain...
patient: is it serious?
All the play dialogue in Rushmore is fucking awesome. I don't know if it's so bad it's good, or if it's just really really really genius.
"Fuhgetabowdit Sanchez, the old man like his cannolis."
"Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else." - Storm "X-Men"
Everysingle line from daredevil
*Adam Sandler shoots James Caan in the head*
Sandler: 'That's what you get for trying to make me suck your dick!'
Bulletproof (1996)
jasper's secret
jasper: look, you fucking ass fuck.
katie: do not call me that unless youre willing to fuck my ass
jasper: you'd keep your mouth shut if you knew what was good for ya'. now, bend over, so i can show you that i'm not all talk.
katie proceeds to bend over...
Quote from: cowboykurtisjasper's secret
jasper: look, you fucking ass fuck.
katie: do not call me that unless youre willing to fuck my ass
jasper: you'd keep your mouth shut if you knew what was good for ya'. now, bend over, so i can show you that i'm not all talk.
katie proceeds to bend over...
i dont know WHAT the hell that is, but it sounds interesting
LOL jesus christ, that's some fucking shitty ass dialogue.....shit man, bend me over and call me katie LOL
"WHAT IS THIS GUY?!...SANDWICH CRAZY?!" taken from -the fast and the furious- can't wait for -2 fast-.
Anything written by George Lucas
QuoteAnything written by George Lucas
:lol:
Jason Mewes' dialogues. sometimes.
All of Tank's dialogue in The Matrix.
"Neo, this is LOCO!"
"Mikey, I think he likes it."
"Believe it or not, you son of a bitch, you're still gonna BURN!"
And it goes on and on...
ohhh yeah, i forgot Revolutions!
Neo: What do you want?
Bane: I want what you want. Yes, that's it Mr. Anderson. Look past the flesh, look through the soft gelatin of these dull cow eyes and see your enemy.
The Oracle: Tonight, the future of both worlds will be in your hands... or in his.
Morpheus: You've never believed in The One.
Niobe: I still don't. I believe in him.
Agent Smith: Why, Mr. Anderson? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you're fighting for something? For more that your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Yes? No? Could it be for love? Illusions, Mr. Anderson. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as the Matrix itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see it, Mr. Anderson. You must know it by now. You can't win. It's pointless to keep fighting. Why, Mr. Anderson? Why? Why do you persist?
Neo: Because I choose to.
Agent Smith: Can you feel it Mr. Anderson? Closing in on you? Oh I can, I really should thank you after all. It was, after all, it was your life that taught me the purpose of all life. Purpose of life is to end.
EDIT:
Trinity: Do it, Neo.
Bane/Smith: Yes, Shoot. Kill us. Fry us. Burn us alive.
Andy Wachowski: WTF happened to us? We ruined a good thing? We forgot what the first one was about?
Larry Wachowski: Oh be nice! Does this dress make me look fat?
Jay: Well, to have all these fucks stop talking shit about us on the Internet.
Banky: What've I been telling you? There's nothing you can do about it. Unless you show up at all their houses and beat the shit out of them.
[Jay and Silent Bob go to all their houses and beat the shit out of them].
Jay: [to Silent Bob] I said you LOVE the cock. I must be the craftiest motherfucker alive.
Jay: What if one day me and Silent Bob are macking some hoes...and she says "Ooo I wanna suck those guys dicks off...whats your name?" and I'm like Jay and Silent Bob, recognize. And she says 'Ohh I read on the Interent that fucking you guys are a bunch of little fucking jerkoffs. Then she goes and sucks two other guys dicks off. Well fuck that. We got to put a stop to these hateful sons of a bitches before they ruin our good name.
You have any other picks, MacGuffin?
Quote from: cronopioYou have any other picks, MacGuffin?
"I live my life a quarter mile at a time. Nothing else matters -- not the mortgage, not the store, not my team and all their bullshit. For those ten seconds or less, I'm free." Dominic - "The Fast and the Furious"
Xander: I wish I had a video camera.
Yelena: What you talkin' 'bout?
Xander: 'Cause this is going to be one hell of a trick.
- "XXX"
Best worst rude dialogue:
Windowlicker.
Brodski: It's gonna take more than a little poke in the ribs to put this old dog down.
[Jason stabs him through the chest again]
Brodski: OK, that ought to do it.
--Jaxon X
Quote from: cronopioBest worst rude dialogue:
Windowlicker.
:lol: :lol: so true.
Best - True Romance:
The entire Dennis Hopper / Christopher Walken scene with the classic history lesson. Talk about contagious laughter.
Another Best would have to go to Sexy Beast and every piece of Ben Kingsley's Dialouge.
Torgo: There is no way out of here. It'll be dark soon. There is no way out of here.
-- Manos: The Hands of Fate
---------------------------
The movie-crashing speech from the end of "Saving Private Ryan"
Private Ryan: This, this one night, two of my brothers came and woke me up in the middle of the night. And they said they had a surprise for me. So they took me to the barn up in the loft and there was my oldest brother, Dan, with Alice, Alice Jardine. I mean, picture a girl who just took a nosedive from the ugly tree and hit every branch coming down. And... and Dan's got his shirt off and he's working on this bra and he's tryin to get it off and all of a sudden Shawn just screams out, Danny you're a young man, don't do it! And so Alice Jardine hears this and she screams and she jumps up and she tries to get running out of the barn but she's still got this shirt over her head. She goes running right into the wall and knocks herself out. So now Danny's just so mad at us. He, he starts coming after us, but... but at the same time Alice is over there unconscious. He's gotta wa... , wake her up. So he grabs her by a leg and he's drag, dragging her. At the same time he picks up a shovel. And he's going after Shawn, and Shawn's saying, what are you trying to hit me for? I just did you a favor! And so this makes Dan more angry. He tries to swing this thing, he looses the shovel, goes outta his grasp and hits a kerosene lantern. The thing explodes, the whole barn almost goes up because of this thing. That was it. That was the last, that was, Dan went off to basic the next day. That was the last night the four of us were together. That was two years ago. Tell me about your wife and those rosebushes?
Hey...I like that speech....
from the preview of the new johnny depp movie, secret window.
depp: i want to know what i'm dealing with here!
charles dutton: you don't want to know.
from On Deadly Ground which was just on TV...
Michael Caine: Shoot me!
Steven Segal: I wouldnt dirty my bullets.
Joan Chen: Dirty one for me, Forrest.
Quote from: MacGuffinBad movies should be forgettable, but for some reason they are so bad they stick in your mind for long after. That reason could be the terrible dialogue. What are some bits of dialogue that have stayed with you and pretty much sum up how horrible the movie is with these lines? Or are there lines from a favorite movie of yours that just make you cringe when you hear them and damper that part of the film for you?
I'll start us off with the prose from the film "Volcano":
Kids are playing rock, scissors, paper.
Kid 1: I win. Rock beats scissors.
Kid 2: Nuh, uh. I'm lava.
Kid 1: What beats lava?
Gabby Hoffman (dramatic pause; heroically): My dad.
I thought Donnie Darko had pretty lame dialogue, but I love the movie. I own it, and I own the soundtrack.
Of course, I own a few movies that I don't particularly love, but I love "something" about them. Usually I get in the right mood, and I wanna show somebody something from a bad movie that I can't explain.
People that watch Donnie Darko with me always complain about the script, but there are several scenes in the movie where I always get a "Wow.." Nobody is impressed with the storyline, but Kelly got it right when it came down to the "experience" of watching his film.
Whenever people ask me about it, I always say: You've gotta see it, but it isn't very good.
As a footnote: The commentary track on the DVD is absolutely terrible. Why do directors feel the need to explain every shot, and their intentions behind this and that? People should take a page out of David Lynch's style of storytelling and just be quiet. Let the film stand on it's own two legs.
Quote from: MyxomatosisAs a footnote: The commentary track on the DVD is absolutely terrible. Why do directors feel the need to explain every shot, and their intentions behind this and that? People should take a page out of David Lynch's style of storytelling and just be quiet. Let the film stand on it's own two legs.
why did you listen to the commentary track after all?
"You can screw the eyes out of a man with this one!"
That one made me laugh non-stop for 2 hours!
Quote from: mogwaiQuote from: MyxomatosisAs a footnote: The commentary track on the DVD is absolutely terrible. Why do directors feel the need to explain every shot, and their intentions behind this and that? People should take a page out of David Lynch's style of storytelling and just be quiet. Let the film stand on it's own two legs.
why did you listen to the commentary track after all?
Probably out of boredom. Alot of times when I am doing work related real estate stuff, I'll put something on in the background to keep me focused. (I know, it sounds crazy) I'm sure this was one of these times. I just remember Richard Kelly going, "Ok, what we meant to convey in this scene is..", and me looking up at my TV and shaking my head.
Quote from: MyxomatosisQuote from: mogwaiQuote from: MyxomatosisAs a footnote: The commentary track on the DVD is absolutely terrible. Why do directors feel the need to explain every shot, and their intentions behind this and that? People should take a page out of David Lynch's style of storytelling and just be quiet. Let the film stand on it's own two legs.
why did you listen to the commentary track after all?
Probably out of boredom. Alot of times when I am doing work related real estate stuff, I'll put something on in the background to keep me focused. (I know, it sounds crazy) I'm sure this was one of these times. I just remember Richard Kelly going, "Ok, what we meant to convey in this scene is..", and me looking up at my TV and shaking my head.
I
like when directors explain why they did something. I wanna know about their process. Especially in this case, where Kelly had to make certain cuts that would've made things a little more clear...
"You're wearing perfume....in the desert"
and then later
"You're not wearing any perfume"
- Beyond Borders Trailer