alright are y'all ready for this shit?
i go to my local shit-aplex (my new name for it now) with my mom to see this movie earlier this evening. we arrived at 4:30 and bought our tickets for the 5:00 show. we purposely got there exceptionally early b/c i was anticipating a large crowd. the line, as it turned out, was unusually meager. we snuck into ocean's 12 for about 20 minutes, then at 4:50 walked into what was now a full theater for the aviator. i found us two seats on the front row (fucking hell) and we waited.
now, it's 5:20, and still, the movie has yet to begin. now, at this local shit-aplex they play these cheesy slides of local business advertisements (i'm sure this is done elsewhere, but i have yet to see it myself at any other theater). at 5:25, finally, this 15 year old kid going nuts in the projection room finally gets the thing going. we all cheer. the trailers begin.
NO FUCKING SOUND.
we sit through trailers for million dollar baby and the new world w/o any audio. miraculously, just as the ultra-cool aviator title logo comes up, the sound comes. we cheer again.
ITS WAY TOO FUCKING LOUD.
now guys, i'm 22 years old. i attend concerts, shows, and other events of similar audible loudness on a regular basis. as a film-buff or fan or whatever the hell you want to call it, i like my movies loud (and my cars fast and beer cold). but this was way beyond any tolerable level i could stand, let alone the near-senile senior citizens that made up the majority of the audience. y'all, i'm taking BALLS-TO-THE-WALLS,-HEAVY-METAL,-TEAR-THE-SKIN-OFF-YOUR-BONE LOUD. after about 15 minutes of this shit, finally someone complains. the sound is finally fixed. we cheer again.
now the sound is too fucking low!! and these amazing flying sequences i'm seeing are not nearly as impressive as they should be because i can barely hear leo talk, let alone hear the fucking airplane engine roar.
let's all stop here and take a deep breath. :breath: :release:.
despite all the fuck ups, i am still loving the movie in everyway- leo at his best, scorsese finally gotten back into his game, cate blanchett is a revelation, everything is working, i'm loving it, right? two and a half hours later, just as mr. hughes is forced to go to that trial thing...
THE MOVIE STOPS.
the audience exploads into a collective roar of frustration.
on screen we're back to the cheesy slides, the first one ironically being "SIT BACK. RELAX. AND ENJOY THE SHOW." we abrupt in angry laughter.
a long 5 minutes go by, and we're off again, finally (by now i'd say at least 10 people had left the theater).
trial ensues for a mere 2 minutes before... you guessed it...
movie stops again.
my patience is now running as thin as possibe, tissue-paper thin.
the 15 year old in the projection room is going nuts, scratching his head, throwing pieces of film around (seriously). a few minutes later, the movie starts...
...then stops yet again for the umteenth time. my mom and i and the majority of the audience leave. the people for the 8:30 show are already impatiently waiting. i already have a cigarette in my mouth as i run-walk to the exit door. my mom is just as mad. we both agree the following; the first two and a half hours were great, the movie theater sucks hairy ass and should be torn down immediately, and we need to injest as much alcohol as humanly possible as soon as possible.
so, um, merry christmas. hope everyone enjoys it as much as i enjoyed the first 3/4ths of it.