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Fast Five

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RegularKarate:


I haven't seen any of the previous Fast and Furious movies, but it didn't matter.  This was so fucking greatdiculous.

All the acting and dialog is miserable and predictable, but it knows that you're just trudging through it all for a ridiculous action sequence and it pays off left and right... because of this, the cliches just feel like the cake around the cream filling.  The entire audience in my theater was laughing and applauding all the way through.

Here are some things that won't really matter because you kind of have to see it for yourself:

- The movie starts off super fast.  Vin Diesel is broken out of a prison bus by cars ramming it to cause it to flip over and smash into a billion pieces.  We're then told in a news report that everybody inside the crash survived.  Now we get to see these knuckleheads rob cars from a moving train... this sequence is insane!

- The Rock is covered in juice throughout the entire movie.  I don't know what's wrong with him, at first, I thought he was just sweaty, but it's really thick and there are lots of scenes where strings of thick drool are coming from his mouth like a dog.  At one point, he meets up with Vin Diesel and Vin is completely dry and the Rock looks like he just got done swimming in bacon grease.

- I kept paying really close attention to how careful Vin Diesel is about saying "R"s since he can't actually say them.  He says "Fweedom" at one point.  You can tell that they probably tried to rewrite his dialogue to get rid of as many Rs as possible, but it's kind of hard in a movie about caRs. 

The onion news network did this which made me want to see it more.  It's pretty spot on and a big part of why I liked Fast Five so much.

Ghostboy:
Yeah, it's pretty awesome. I loved how bad the dramatic stuff was - all the 'nothing is more important than family' dialogue that was so knowingly written for the lowest common denominator.

Best line: "I'll ride with you."

Although my favorite line from the trailer didn't make the cut, which was a bummer ("we're gonna end up behind bars or dead in a ditch...but not today").

picolas:

--- Quote from: Ghostboy on May 02, 2011, 01:32:52 PM ---Although my favorite line from the trailer didn't make the cut, which was a bummer ("we're gonna end up behind bars or dead in a ditch...but not today").

--- End quote ---
i think you mean "we're gonna end up behind bars or dead in a ditch...but not todayyyyyy."

modage:

--- Quote from: RegularKarate on May 02, 2011, 01:08:59 PM ---I haven't seen any of the previous Fast and Furious movies, but it didn't matter.  This was so fucking greatdiculous.

--- End quote ---

I've never seen one either but everything I've heard about it (particularly references to vintage Michael Bay) makes me want to see it now.  The Onion thing was the best, too.

Mr. Merrill Lehrl:
spoilers I guess ... but come on

It pulls my least favorite action movie move - my least favorite of all time - when it frees itself from a narrative corner by having villains appear out of nowhere with bazookas.  That's such a cheap, uncreative move.

The series inches nearer to the absurdity of comic book movies (or, sure, Michael Bay) in its final moments.  Don't get me wrong, the series has always been absurd, but nothing as absurd as the final act of this one.  To a certain crowd absurd = great.  Gee I wish that crowd has been present at my showing, I'd have had a great time like RegularKarate.  Unfortunately there were about ten people at my Saturday 1030 showing, and if you have to actually sit in the theater and deal with this movie, actually process what's happening, the ending is too much to take.  Certain sudden developments almost made me hate the engorged running time.

It does matter if you've seen the previous Fast movies, because for example although overall the movie was spoiled for me by creative decisions that disappointed me and an underwhelming audience, I was still able to engage with the odd intimacy and charm the series has and continues to cultivate.  The great thing about the series that Lin continues to perfect is the right balance of over-the-top and completely serious.  The 6th is set up during the credit sequence.  I got excited.  I think this was a transitional one.  It's indeed won new fans and brought people around, getting the big bo numbers, so I hope the next one is batshit nuts and really works.  

Will the success of this one will keep Justin Lin around, or will he jump ship?  I hope on the one hand he doesn't jump because the next one will undoubtedly be bigger and badder, but on the other hand he's done three of these and delivered mega success so deserves to have whatever project he really wants.

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