Author Topic: WOODWORK - A short film  (Read 1563 times)

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I Love a Magician

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WOODWORK - A short film
« on: May 10, 2010, 10:12:09 PM »
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WOODWORK



hey y'all, here's a short film i made with my girlfriend and some buds. she directed, i shot it, and my friend steven page starred and did the music. we've got some nits to pick with it but we're really please with it considering none of us knew what we were doing. check it out and let us know what you think. thanks.

Pubrick

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #1 on: May 10, 2010, 11:24:51 PM »
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it's no wrestlng video..

looks good. starts out like a million other amateur shorts (with someone waking up) and i like where it goes, i like the outdoor setting. i get the title but not much else. i don't see a story, but i guess it's sposed to be whimsical or something. it feels like a (really long) introduction to a character. he's lonely, a bit nuts, but happy.. and then it ends.

i watched it cos i think you're awesome, and with a good story i think you could really do something great. i can imagine this working as a loosely plotted "story" arc for a music video, at half the length.
endless 'nothing is what it seems'-isms

I Love a Magician

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2010, 12:53:45 AM »
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thanks for watching it, man. wish you'd liked it more but i appreciate any type of feedback. next project (other than maybe more wrestling stuff) ought to have more of an actual story.

matt35mm

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #3 on: May 11, 2010, 02:26:25 AM »
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I have been looking forward to this!  Glad to finally see it!

I think that the general idea of the film is fine, though I think it could have been much shorter without losing much.  I quite like the dialogue (monologue, since he's alone?), and the absurdity of it, though I would have liked to see better acting, or at least more commitment in the delivery (everything is sorta half-said).  I think his bit when he's on the phone is my favorite part of the movie; it's the only part that I felt had a distinctive character, something you'll never hear in a short film made in L.A.  I also liked the music quite a bit.

I'm a little bit surprised that it didn't look better, mainly regarding exposure levels. 

I agree with P that you are awesome and I really am so happy that you're venturing into narrative filmmaking, because I know that as you do more and learn more, you'll be making some really great stuff.  Keep on keeping on!

Congrats to you and Courtney.  I will watch anything and everything you two make, with pleasure.  So please make more, and more, and more.

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #4 on: May 11, 2010, 03:21:16 AM »
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thanks, matt. i'm not 100% happy with my work shooting the movie and there are dozens of things i would do differently now if i could, but sometimes you have to work with what you've got (but most of it is on me, i should've been better prepared). shots and things are gonna get better as i use the camera more. as of now i'm using it when i scrounge up the money to rent it which is usually for the day or three that i'm shooting something.

the music is probably the best thing in the movie as far as quality goes. steven (acted and did music for us) is a really great musician so i think we're gonna try to do a music video together this summer.

anyone with a 7D care to take a look and let me know how i could improve?

Pas

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #5 on: May 11, 2010, 08:25:12 AM »
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Hahaha that was pretty great. Some quick comments:

- That actor is hilarious to me, when he laughs at the joke on the phone it's really funny. Actually, the phone part is the best of the short, really good stuff.

- At first I wasn't so sure because the first shot the camera is way too shaky and I didn't like that so much, but as soon as he gets out of his house it becomes really good.

- The music is top-notch.

- When he does push-ups hahaha I don't know that was hilarious.

- It becomes a bit too goofy at the end when he shakes trees and dances with a little bush and stuff but it was still pretty funny.

- When he draws the duck and then colors it, man that was funny.

It was fun, thanks!

Alexandro

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #6 on: May 11, 2010, 10:56:10 AM »
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I will second P and Matt on this. And you I guess, since the music is easily the most accomplished aspect. The idea and concept is cool too, there's not much of a story but maybe it doesn't need it. Maybe what it needs is to be a little more compact, mainly at the beginning.

It would have been nice if you had taken the time to work on the character more, with the actor and in the writing too probably, so that he would come across more clearly in the scenes. His day at work is kind of boring and maybe that's the point but it would have been cool to see him actually doing some work instead of pretending to work, of for no other reason because it would have enabled you to play around more with the actor. About him well, yeah, you needed to be tougher on the man, or have another, more "me, me, me" actor who demands to be seen.

Overall it's pretty good, I liked the ending too, shaking hands with trees.

I Love a Magician

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #7 on: May 11, 2010, 11:04:19 AM »
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thanks, pas and Alexandro.

RegularKarate

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #8 on: May 11, 2010, 02:33:00 PM »
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I'm pretty much echoing a lot of what's been said, but I liked it overall.  The music is definitely the best part.

I think the actor was good.  Everyone's favorite part seems to be the phone call (which is great), but my favorite is when he's watching TV... he seems tickled in a way that he doesn't really get why.

I agree it could be shorter.  I especially get bored with every other indie film starting with someone getting ready for the day (and the title usually comes exactly where you put yours).  I get why it's done, but I feel like there should be a better way.  To me, the only reason to show them getting ready for the day should be if they do something different than everyone else.  Luckily, this wasn't that long and once he left, the film picked up.

I laughed when he showed up and there were birthday decorations.  I think it would have been a stronger ending if he hadn't spent so much time talking with the trees afterward.  That's just me though.

As far as it goes visually, I think some of the handheld stuff could use some fluidity.  You can see the light weight of the camera in the motion.  Were you just holding it or did you have it on a mount?  I like shakey handheld, but the shake was a little too busy for me... if you weighed it down a bit more, I feel like it would look better.

Anyway, good job, and like everyone else, I'll keep watching the stuff you make because you're great.

I Love a Magician

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #9 on: May 11, 2010, 02:52:44 PM »
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thanks, RK. i've gotten better with it since the wrestling video (which was more agreeable with it anyway), but the shake is something i really need to work on. for this i was supposed to be getting a cheap steadicam made for me, but ended up just putting it on a monopod hoping that would steady it out a little bit.

glad everyone likes the music, steven will be pleased.

Alexandro

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #10 on: May 11, 2010, 03:25:37 PM »
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yeah, I would get rid of the whole waking up getting ready for the day beginning. show him just walking to the office, we'll see how he lives alone and his house later in the movie. AND you can START with the music, which is awesome.

Pas

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Re: WOODWORK - A short film
« Reply #11 on: May 11, 2010, 06:09:04 PM »
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yeah, I would get rid of the whole waking up getting ready for the day beginning. show him just walking to the office, we'll see how he lives alone and his house later in the movie. AND you can START with the music, which is awesome.
:yabbse-thumbup: :yabbse-thumbup: :yabbse-thumbup:

Totally.

 

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