Respect

[aclockworkjj]

Saying "I like big boobies" seems much less offensive to me than "You're a stupid asshole ACJJ".

Well you are in the minority Pas...I like the fact that you bring my name into this though (in fact I buy you this for doing so). I lot of this has directly to do with me.  Did I mean to offend the female populous here ever....no.  But do I think some are (guys and girls) tight wads that can't take a joke...yes.  I agree wholehearted with Mac here, but if there is one negative I see coming out of this: it's the fact some are being molded.  Saying this is how you should act, post, think, and agree with always.  I am talking broader than me being a dipshit.  A lot of you are soley thread fillers (nothing wrong with that), but there are a few I know that have gangs of opinions...but don't share them cause they may not fit into this "xixaxian behavior".  If you think there aren't a few that will in fact try to mold you...think again.  Don't "post like this", "post like this"...do this, and whatever you do, "don't ever disagree" with a few.  Now, the case and point here...did I ever mean to offend someone by saying something like "boobies"?  No..sorry, it's the little kid in me and I always just found that word to be funny and silly sounding (or looking here I guess).  I for the most part left it in one thread.  

I just hope that everyone doesn't become this asexual enigma of what are precieved to be the "good contributor's" here.  Not to say that some decentency shouldn't be maintained (I will do my part), but look at the average age amongst us...what is it...probably around 18-19.  That just screams raging hormones.  (It's okay...it's normal)  I am beginning to think that maybe in fact some of the folks here are just such social outkasts that maybe they are asexual...shit, I dunno.  Right, this place is about film...but coming from someone who has been labeled "unoriginal", "boring", "one-dimensional", and god forbid "phoney".  I don't see much of the opposite coming in from staggering numbers...most will just simply agree or completely skip over a debate they have strong feelings on all together.  Ok, there was one person awhile back that sorta had a problem forming a constructive debate (he is on to bigger and brighter things), but it's not to say that others shouldn't try.  Whether about film, politics...or heaven forbid...making sweet passionate toe-curling love.  

Like I said, I will do my best to not be such a dirtbag around here, but I am a guy, I love women, and will continue to do so.  Others may not like what I have to say, but how constructive is it when some members put forth more time and effort into telling me how much I suck, than actually mabye showing a bit of themselves.  I don't mind taking tbe blunt end of the stick...but I also don't want to see other members afraid to post anything...ever.  And throughout this whole thing, I got the feeling of I was the exception here to respect...I don't mind, but that's not cool...cause I don't ever go outta my way to directly hate on someone.  

Yeah...that PTA...he's alright...

[Find Your Magali]

:: raps aclockworkjj on the side of the shoulder in a completely macho manner ::

Well said, aclockworkjj! ... From the heart, man. I'm with ya. ... And good luck to your Yankees tonight.

On a semi-related note, I've been an "asexual enigma" since 1993 and it's really not that bad.  

[godardian]

Saying "I like big boobies" seems much less offensive to me than "You're a stupid asshole ACJJ".

Well you are in the minority Pas...I like the fact that you bring my name into this though (in fact I buy you this for doing so). I lot of this has directly to do with me.  Did I mean to offend the female populous here ever....no.  But do I think some are (guys and girls) tight wads that can't take a joke...yes.  I agree wholehearted with Mac here, but if there is one negative I see coming out of this: it's the fact some are being molded.  Saying this is how you should act, post, think, and agree with always.  I am talking broader than me being a dipshit.  A lot of you are soley thread fillers (nothing wrong with that), but there are a few I know that have gangs of opinions...but don't share them cause they may not fit into this "xixaxian behavior".  If you think there aren't a few that will in fact try to mold you...think again.  Don't "post like this", "post like this"...do this, and whatever you do, "don't ever disagree" with a few.  Now, the case and point here...did I ever mean to offend someone by saying something like "boobies"?  No..sorry, it's the little kid in me and I always just found that word to be funny and silly sounding (or looking here I guess).  I for the most part left it in one thread.  

I just hope that everyone doesn't become this asexual enigma of what are precieved to be the "good contributor's" here.  Not to say that some decentency shouldn't be maintained (I will do my part), but look at the average age amongst us...what is it...probably around 18-19.  That just screams raging hormones.  (It's okay...it's normal)  I am beginning to think that maybe in fact some of the folks here are just such social outkasts that maybe they are asexual...shit, I dunno.  Right, this place is about film...but coming from someone who has been labeled "unoriginal", "boring", "one-dimensional", and god forbid "phoney".  I don't see much of the opposite coming in from staggering numbers...most will just simply agree or completely skip over a debate they have strong feelings on all together.  Ok, there was one person awhile back that sorta had a problem forming a constructive debate (he is on to bigger and brighter things), but it's not to say that others shouldn't try.  Whether about film, politics...or heaven forbid...making sweet passionate toe-curling love.  

Like I said, I will do my best to not be such a dirtbag around here, but I am a guy, I love women, and will continue to do so.  Others may not like what I have to say, but how constructive is it when some members put forth more time and effort into telling me how much I suck, than actually mabye showing a bit of themselves.  I don't mind taking tbe blunt end of the stick...but I also don't want to see other members afraid to post anything...ever.  And throughout this whole thing, I got the feeling of I was the exception here to respect...I don't mind, but that's not cool...cause I don't ever go outta my way to directly hate on someone.  

Yeah...that PTA...he's alright...

I don't think anyone should worry about being told directly not what to post/not post... I think MacGuf was just asking people to use a little bit better judgment at times. I don't think anyone who feels like comments they've made/pics they've put up have fallen under the "poor judgment" category in the past should feel attacked in the least... I'm guessing Macguffin avoided naming names because a) that's counterproductive and usually unfair, and b) many people here could benefit from re-evaluating the sexual content of what they're posting.

I think this whole thread exists not at all to make rules or laws, but just to remind everyone that there are people here who, even if they don't actually take offense at some of the more graphic/locker-room type sexual stuff, really would appreciate it if that kind of thing could be kept to an as-absolutely-necessary basis. Like, maybe think twice before creating/disrupting an entire thread based on your sex life/lack thereof/fantasy sex life, etc. If it comes up, fine, but I think this thread is in response to a decrease in common sense and judgment recently. If "being yourself" unequivocally necessitates a total lack of boundaries regarding how lascivious you can be on Xixax, that's your problem; everyone reading these threads shouldn't have to shoulder the burden of that, and we can't help you with it, anyway.

I wouldn't be scared of the thought police coming, or anything... obviously, we're all sexual people here, because we're human. I think the message here is that a preoccupation with that here, on this board, which is mainly supposed to be about film and is therefore for people of varying races, genders, and sexualities (which we definitely do have here) to enjoy, might be a little ill-advised.

I don't think anyone should take it personally. Just be thoughtful, use common sense, don't take your relative anonymity here as a license to be childishly preoccupied with sex. This is not the place to vent our raging hormones. Nobody here cares to have it made obvious how horny anyone else is. Our culture is full to the brim with places/venues/outlets for that- why do it here?

[ᾦɐļᵲʊʂ]

On a semi-related note, I've been an "asexual enigma" since 1993

Not something to be proud about, Pat.

[aclockworkjj]

godardian

I understand what you are trying to say...but realize you have been gone for a long time.

EDIT:
ps. realize I am the exact opposite of you in regards to women.  Not a bad thing either (I love ya), but you are talking from a completely different side of the spectrum.

[Sleuth]

There are still a million arguments to be had about Radiohead, for instance...  

Yeah, boy do they ever suck balls, huh?

(Michael ducks)

That's it!  This thread is about respect, and it's clear that Godardian is the most disrespectful person on this board and I can't stand being a member here anymore!  I am leaving FOREVER

[godardian]

godardian

I understand what you are trying to say...but realize you have been gone for a long time.

Well, just speaking for myself- I don't single you out on this issue. Or anyone else, really.

[godardian]

There are still a million arguments to be had about Radiohead, for instance...  

Yeah, boy do they ever suck balls, huh?

(Michael ducks)

That's it!  This thread is about respect, and it's clear that Godardian is the most disrespectful person on this board and I can't stand being a member here anymore!  I am leaving FOREVER

You forgot:

**stamps up stairs and slams bedroom door**

[Jeremy Blackman]

But do I think some are (guys and girls) tight wads that can't take a joke...yes.

Like I said before, minstrels were funny, but that doesn't justify them.

But the only thing that bothers me is referring to women as 'bitches'. I haven't seen it here yet, and if I did I'd go off on whoever said it.

http://xixax.com/viewtopic.php?t=3805

Originally "Banky's Bitches"...

Seriously though, Pookie, there aren't many people here who actually think your opinion doesn't matter because of your gender.

Well, I don't think it's a matter of thinking her opinion doesn't matter. It's more like (as pookie said) people thinking of her thoughts and ideas differently, and of her differently. Look how much things changed after the "im sooo sexy" thread. There was a lot of "wow, you're smart for 15"... but I think there was also some "wow, you're smart for a girl." I know it may be unconscious (and implied), but it seems like people can stretch to spin their replies in some seudo-sexual way.

[Gamblour.]

but I am a guy, I love women, and will continue to do so.

I agree, I know that when I post anything about women, it's out of a love and need for them. Other times, it's been with a sense of humor about things, which is always needed but a good comedian knows when to draw the line. I like to think I'm a good comedian.

By the way, I know that in my case, the sudden attention brought to this could-have-been issue has made me not guilty but very aware and conscious of what I've posted and will post.

[aclockworkjj]

thanks for sheding some light JB...you jester...

note to all xixaxers...follow JB's lead if you want to be respected.  If you don't you will get threatened to be banned....

agree with him always, and all is good.

[Gold Trumpet]

Just be thoughtful, use common sense, don't take your relative anonymity here as a license to be childishly preoccupied with sex. This is not the place to vent our raging hormones. Nobody here cares to have it made obvious how horny anyone else is. Our culture is full to the brim with places/venues/outlets for that- why do it here?

History of this board and previous one disagrees with your assertion that is the wrong place to talk about such things. It is the right thing, and as hinted, this forum is dominated by 18-20 year old males. And also criticized, it generally lacks "meaningful posts about film". Thats the oldest complaint here. All this leads to is that this forum really is a "community forum with an agreed upon interest in movies". I know movies and talk about them aren't the greatest concern. They never were. The interaction between members on the board is what is dominant and thus, personalities show.

Now, personally, I think it is a nice thing to remind everyone of thoughtfulness on attitudes toward women and others considering the barrage of threads recently. In my opinion, though, the complaints of what was said aren't really that bad. I've said two hundred times worst than anything posted, though I do like to stay away from "bitches" as general comment. Besides the large number of "more insulting" threads showing up all at once, nothing is different. Certain people here are mainly present for just sex jokes and in every kind of topic immaginable, sex jokes are tossed around like nothing. It's just character identity. So I think a certain member, obvious to all, is getting hanged here. He is outside of a clique and made the mistake of posting 2 months worth of sex ammo all in one week. With flow of new topics on Idle Chatter kinda slow, it was even more obvious.

And to make a final comment, I remembered one member who debuted at the old board and consistently (in speedy fashion) posted just sexual replies showing everything complained about here. Threads were made to say how terrible it was and everyone unofficially signed a petition agreeing it was bad. Let time pass and he is now one of the most popular members on the board. I always liked him myself, but a uniquely similiar story with a curve ball ending. Clique clique.

~rougerum

[godardian]

ps. realize I am the exact opposite of you in regards to women.  Not a bad thing either (I love ya), but you are talking from a completely different side of the spectrum.

Well, there's a huge flaw in that logic, though: I'm absolutely certain that I'm as passionately attracted to males as you are to females, but I don't think I've ever gone overboard in objectifying males or being explicit about my sexual fantasies here. It's a different part of the spectrum, but it's still the same spectrum, and in this context, I think the same guidelines/thoughtfulness should apply.

I'm not saying it's bad for anyone to be sexually incorrigible towards men OR women (or both, if you're very modern ), not at all; I just think that maybe there are better places to go into the finer details of those things than this board, where it would make more sense to do so.

[Gamblour.]

Look how much things changed after the "im sooo sexy" thread. There was a lot of "wow, you're smart for 15"... but I think there was also some "wow, you're smart for a girl." I know it may be unconscious (and implied), but it seems like people can stretch to spin their replies in some seudo-sexual way.

I know that there's been a lot of half-way complaints about not being able to find girls in the real world who dig movies like Magnolia. I don't have any specific threads to reference, but I do remember that's popped up a few times. Perhaps this generalization has carried over into the realm of equating movie tastes with intellect and we let it come out, as you said, in a way relating to sex. This is just pure conjecture, I'm just hypothesizing the psychology of the whole situation. Just trying to "...look closer."  

[aclockworkjj]

but it's still the same spectrum,

I dig ya man...but no, it's not the same spectrum, and realize I am not this complete homophob either.  Shit, my best friend since moving here is a gay little asian kid (haha...I go to the clubs with him...nothing like west hollywood)...so it's not a matter of that...but it's not the same thing.  At all.