short script: CHICKEN FETUS

[Victor]

I just wrote this tonight, not quite sure on the title yet but:



INT. KITCHEN - DAY.

ECU- A FRYING PAN ON A STOVE.  An egg is cracked on the side and the yolk is poured in the pan. Then another egg. Then another.

CU- TOASTER.  Two pieces of bread put in.

CU- GLASS. OJ poured in.

CU- PLATE. Eggs are placed onto it, followed by the toast.

CU- SALT AND PEPPER SHAKERS. Grabbed.

ANGLE, A WOMAN’S CHEST. She shakes the salt, then pepper on her eggs. She wears a cross around her neck.

CU- THE PLATE, NOW ON THE KITCHEN TABLE. A fork comes into FRAME and takes a hunk of egg from the plate. CAMERA pans with the fork up to her face as she takes a bite. This is the face of THERESA POLK (30’s).

WIDE ANGLE. She eats her eggs in silence.

CUT TO:

EXT. PARKING LOT - DAY.

OUT OF FOCUS, UNTIL --

THERESA’S CAR PULLS INTO FRAME. She takes her sunglasses off, buissness-like, gets out of her car and walks around to the trunk (CAMERA stays with her until noted, STEADICAM). She opens up the trunk and gets something out, below frame. She closes the trunk and starts walking, CAMERA leading her...she walks puposefully....she smiles;

OC WOMAN LUCY
HI!

THERESA
Hi, how’s it going?

CAMERA WHIPS around to see A BUNCH OF PICKETERS OUTSIDE AN ABORTION CLINIC. There’s about 7 of them, all with signs. Lucy steps up, the others start to crowd around.

LUCY
Hi, Im Lucy Blumer, what’s your name?

THERESA (stepping into FRAME)
Theresa Polk.

LUCY
Theresa Polk, that’s a nice name. Welcome. It’s nice to see a new face here. Let me introduce you to everyone, This is Frida..

FRIDA
Hi...

Lucy introduces a few more people, Theresa shakes hands, etc...

INT. ABORTION CLINIC - THAT MOMENT - LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW.

We see Theresa greeting everyone outside, from inside. RACK FOCUS to see:

RICKY, eating chips, looking through the window.

RICKY
Hey Don, check this out -- the protesters, they got a new girl.

DON (OC)
Im busy.

RICKY
She’s pretty cute.

Don walks in, looks through the window.

DON
Oh, SHIT.

CUT TO:

EXT. ABORTION CLINIC - MOMENT LATER.

Don walks out, CAMERA (HAND HELD) stays with him as he walks. He approaches the crowd, they start to go ape shit;

CROWD
What are you doing over here baby killer...we have a right to be here...youre going to hell, you know that...etc, etc...

DON
What the hell are you doing here?

THERESA
I have a right to be here.

CROWD
Yeah shes got a RIGHT to be here. etc.

DON
Look, its over okay, Im sorry, but deal with it.

THERESA
Oh no, Don. No, its not over, not yet. Not by a long-shot.

DON
Look, you’re just embarrasing yourself. You’re pro-choice anyway, what the hell are you doing here? Everybody, she’s PRO-CHOICE!

The crowd starts getting antsy...

THERESA
Im CATHOLIC, asshole.

DON
Well you certainly didnt have any problem dating a clinic worker for five months.

The crowd is taken aback.

THERESA
And you didnt have a problem breaking it off with me for nothing, no reason at all. And having the nerve to do it in a letter, after five months? Thats a fucking insult, so are such a coward it makes me sick.

DON
Yeah well, my mind is made up, so, there’s really no reason for you to be here.

THERESA
Im pregnant.

Don is speechless.....

DON
That’s bullshit.

THERESA
No.

DON
You’re serious.

THERESA
I’m serious. And I’m having it.

DON
Now come on. Let’s talk about this. Let’s go inside.

THERESA
No, I’m not talking about a goddamn thing. If you wanted to talk, you wouldn’t have given me that letter, you wouldve talked then. But now its too late. Just go, go back inside. I have nothing to say to you.

DON
This is fucking ridiculous.

THERESA
You’re fucking ridiculous. Dad.

Don, in shock, starts to walk away. He stops.

DON
If you have this kid, it’ll be the worst mistake you’ve ever made.

THERESA
Well you helped make it. You’re gonna be responsible.

DON
...FUCK YOU. FUCKIN FUCK ALL OF YOU!

LUCY
FUCK YOU BABYKILLER!

CROWD
(goes apeshit)

Don keeps walking...suddenly: an EGG hits him SQUARE IN THE BACK.

The CROWD stops. Don stops. He turns around.
Theresa is standing there, next to her shopping bag, with an egg carton in her hand.

DON
You fucking bitch...

Don starts walking towards her, she throws another egg and hits him again. She keeps whipping them...
Lucy grabs another carton out of Theresa’s bag and starts whipping them...
Don turns and makes a dash for the clinic...
The CROWD all start taking cartons out of Theresa’s bag and throwing them at the clinic and Don...who just barely makes it inside --

CUT TO:

INT. CLINIC - THAT MOMENT.

RICKY is sitting by the window with another WORKER, stunned. An EGG hits the window. Don bursts in --

RICKY
Yo Don what the FUCK.

DON
My ex-girlfriend. She’s pregnant. She says she’s having the baby.

RICKY
No fucking way....hey I thought you said she was pro-choice.

DON
She is...she’s just doing it to bust my balls.

Ricky and the Worker stare at Don.

DON
WHAT?

They turn and look out the window again.

DOLLY IN a little on Don. We hear the eggs pounding outside.

CUT TO BLACK.

[bonanzataz]

i like it.

[Pedro]

man that's a groovy little scene.  you really do have a nice flair for dialogue yes.  I dig it.

[markums2k]

I don't know if you're looking for criticism, but here I go... don't try and stop me...  

If I were to make any changes at all, it would only be to remove all references to the break-up letter.  For example, the line "If you wanted to talk, you wouldn't have given me that letter..."  Those types of lines are just too clunky to deliver effectively.  Even if it gives insight into Don's character, or Theresa's anger, no matter how you say it-- it just sounds like exposition.

That's all I got.  Abortion Clinics aren't my cup of tea, but it flows pretty nicely.  I could see the shots happening in my head, which is a good thing.  Thank you for sharing!