The stupidest thing you've heard someone say about a movie..

[Bud_Clay]

It's funny and true that the simple minded are always verbally expressing their opinions during movies. Not only are they incapable of thinking to themselves but when they are talking (constantly) it makes you wonder if they are capable of thinking at all.

Here's one that I'm constantly hearing when in discussion of Magnolia: "What's with the frogs?" A lot of people actually don't like the entire movie simply because of the frog scene confusing them.  Interestingly enough that movie sort of does bare a defining line where people stand with their intelligence, it seems anyway.

Just recently I walked into the ending credits of "The Hours" late at night, and I heard the only two people in there say "It was a pretty good movie, huh?" "Yeah well this music is terrible though." I'm just amazed only 15 seconds in the theater I hear a stupid woman criticise Philip Glass.

[EL__SCORCHO]

How about when Britney Spears was quoted saying (either in rolling stone or premiere):

"The movies [at sundance] are wierd. You actually have to think about them."

apprently she couldnt take it and walked out on a few.

cant remember which magazine it was cuz i immediately tore it up cuz I was so pissed.

[CollinBullock]

Just when I was thinking about how Britney Spears should be the new editor of Cashiers Du Cinemart

[bonanzataz]

My parents liked Pulp Fiction a lot, actually. Wouldn't let me see it until I was older though.  Fuckers.

The only movies I wasn't allowed to see until I was older were a Clockwork Orange and Boogie Nights (i snuck boogie nights when my mom wasn't looking though...hehehe).

[Fernando]

This wasn't heard in a cinema nor is the stupidiest thing said but I read it in a review of Magnolia at the imdb, it actually made me laugh.

Summary: A CHINESE WATER TORTURE OF SHAMELESS PRETENSION

Review: 'Uggghhh! Man, did this movie suck...If someone wanted to torture me to death Clockwork-Orange style all they'd have to do is force me to watch this embarrassment back-to-back with Kubrick's humiliating final stinker 'Eyes Wide Shut.' I would beg them to put a bullet through my cranium.'

The review is pretty long, so I only posted a small part of it.

[bonanzataz]

So, we were watching "Glory" in American History and we get to the end. SPOILERS FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN'T SEEN GLORY

Denzel and matt broderick die at the very end of the movie, to which a girl in the class responds, "i can't believe they died. they completely wasted the talent of those actors."

[Ravi]

In my humanities class we watched part of Branagh's Henry V and one of the TAs said she didn't like his adaptation of Hamlet because it was set in a later time and some things were changed from the original.  Who cares?  Hamlet is an awesome movie.  I dunno, I thought it was stupid.

[Pedro]

A customer review from Amazon.com on Punch-Drunk Love
This customer rated it 1 out of 5

Adam Sandler is a talented actor. However, this was his worst movie by far. He has been type-cast into a raging maniac in one too many films. I mean really... what was the plot to this film?  Adam Sandler destroys the men's bathroom - for no reason. He breaks things in his sisters house - for no reason. He is basically an anti social misfit. Yet, he owns his own business, maintains his temper with his employees, has a fudge pudding fetish and wears the same outfit for the entire movie.  Why Punch Drunk Love? This movie should have been called "Sugar makes me Crazy!"
If this was suppose to be a break through performance for Adam Sandler... this film failed miserably. He needs an opportunity to act and display his overall talent (Remember Saturday Night Live). Not just a character that resorts to violence in EVERY film.  Adam if your reading this. Sorry bro the truth hurts. You are a superstar - ask for better scripts.

[cine]

What the fuck?  There was so much wrong with that guy its not even worth mentioning. Break through performance.. ugh... yeah. I don't think he received a Golden Globe nod for "Happy Gilmore.".. "Sugar Makes Me Crazy!"?  He was clearly watching another movie.

Its guys like this that I wish Barry Egan would smash his face with a sledgehammer.

[Pedro]

What the fuck?  There was so much wrong with that guy its not even worth mentioning. Break through performance.. ugh... yeah. I don't think he received a Golden Globe nod for "Happy Gilmore.".. "Sugar Makes Me Crazy!"?  He was clearly watching another movie.

Its guys like this that I wish Barry Egan would smash his face with a sledgehammer.

Damn right, brotha.  I respect ya man, respect.  Amazon reviews are the worst.  Just be glad I'm not posting the reviews of Magnolia.

[bonanzataz]

Damn right, brotha.  I respect ya man, respect.  Amazon reviews are the worst.  Just be glad I'm not posting the reviews of Magnolia.

ooh, back when it first came out i posted a really nasty review of magnolia. not REALLY nasty, but nasty enough to hurt some of your feelings.

[©brad]

hmmmm, then why r u here?

[life_boy]

One time I was talking to a friend of mine about widescreen (this was before the age of the DVD).  Apparently, he had taken a class where they had watched some VHS and it was in widescreen.  He said the teacher told him that it's called the 'Director's Cut' when it 'has the bars'.  I said it wasn't called the Director's cut because of the bars, the Director's Cut has added footage to make the cut of the film the director wanted.  It's called 'letterbox' when it has the bars.  He didn't believe me because 'that's what his teacher said'!  I couldn't believe it!

I had another friend who tried to give some shit about Eyes Wide Shut.  I said it was a great movie and he said it was a piece of shit and that the only reason Kubrick made it was as 'a final prank on the world'!  I didn't even try to argue with him.  I figured all hope was lost for this guy if he thought Kubrick spent the last years of his life making a film knowing it was a complete piece of shit and laughing the whole way through while wasting the time of everyone involved and dying after finishing it.  I think they were just mad because it was slowly paced and they didn't get it.  

Another thing that annoys me is when people like a good movie, but for the 'wrong' reasons.  Like when people like Fight Club just because they fight or when people like American Histoy X just because he's a racist.  That bugs the hell out of me!  I also hate it when people like a movie simply because of the 'novelty' of it.  Like when people like Pulp Fiction just because they talk about hamburgers and shit before they kill someone.  Or they like A Clockwork Orange because it's violent but with 'funny' music.  

I'm starting to agree with Collin's thoughts.  "A nuclear war is looking better everyday!"

[©brad]

heheh. feel ur pain. u know what pisses me off? u know those annoying little shits that know a movie so well they feel the need to recite the entire fucking thing word for word? yesterday we were watching goodfellas and this little prick was pulling that shit for about 30 mins., showing no signs of giving up after much extreme verbal and physical abuse me and my buddies were giving him. During the joe pesci "why am I funny scene" it got so bad one of my friends threw a full beer can right at his head, resulting in a little blood and a lot of laughter from me.

[life_boy]

I usually run into that scenario at the mention of Monty Python, specifically Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  A couple of lines are okay but do we really have to hear the whole fuckin' movie?!?!  It just gets old after a bit (not to mention makes the movie less funny because we've heard the lines more).