i love this forum, i wish i was more into movies like i used to.
being a movie fan takes a lot of time, a lot of time that i fight to produce and when i get it, it's a privilege. and i guess the older you are, the less you're willing to be forgiving about things that aren't doing anything to you. for example, i had to stop watching paper man today because the idea of jeff daniels having an imaginary friend and being a schizo writer looking for inspiration riding a chopper bike is unbearable now. it might've been great in 2002, but that quirkiness is very off putting now. i try to stay active, i keep a list of stuff that i want to see ( today i saw catfish and i'm still here, both were cool, i thought). but i don't know.... i think it's bad to only go see stuff that you already know you're going to like because there's something unhealthy in that idea, but i just can't go and see despicable me or dinner for schmucks , in the same way i just can't keep up with everything that exists in the criterion collection and all of that. i wish i had the time to know what's so good about john cassavetes, or to watch a fellini movie for once. the idea was once attractive, to know everything there is to know about film, watch all the movies, but then you see how little use it has , and how very few people manage to maintain their dignity and humanity in being a living film encyclopedia, and it sucks... you're welcome to recommend a starting point for both of those directors, tho!
i was looking in a magazine at all the stuff they played at the morelia film festival in mexico and all the stills of the movies look fantastic, like stories i want to see . it reminded me of how cool it was to look at magazines like cahiers du cinema when i was younger and stalked godard and was into the french wave. but man , there are more important things in life to me now, and i hate the person that halts his own life to be in favor of cinema, like a desease...i hate that arrogant person to whom it is a virtue to have seen all of robert altman's movies, obviously, but i also hate that person who won't be able to enjoy toy story because of how it validates guantanamo bay because in the end it's barbie and ken taking care of sunnyside. these people do exist, but luckily there's most of you, always saying the right joke about movies that are good, but not too good ,like that time Stefen suggested Clooney's character in up in the air should've gone by himself to his sister's wedding to hit on all the chicks, i stil laugh at that, and i wish more people were into movies that way... it's so boring to talk about movies in my normal life. no one cares about having an interesting opinion about any movie, or about anything. a little off topic, but i also don't like people who're into all of the TED talks but are the laziest ppl in the planet. grow the fuck up, you'll never be proactive if you're already not, and if you are, you don't need to be reminded of what you already know.
what i find the most sad about people involved in film is that they think taste is a practical, beautiful thing that they somehow will find a use for, but that will never ever ever happen, because taste and conceptions of beauty and the cannon are ... i don't even think i need to finish that idea it's disgusting.
when i left the forum a few months ago i wanted my life to go a certain way, and i forced myself to work in a way i had never worked. it was a cute idea, and i recommend everyone to stay off the things you adore the most for a while like sleeping, drinking, eating, smoking and checking the internet every 5 minutes, to get some perspective. i know it sounds controversial and cavalier but now i know some things about myself that i didn't. i know, for example, that i could never work in a movie unless i was the person with all of the money and control, because otherwise i'm not strong enough to yell and people and get things the way i want them to. i have other means of working and i try to get good at those... i also know that i wouldn't like to be a writer, because honestly , who cares. i'm embarassed of how stupid and plain most of my problems and thoughts are , so instead of validating my problems and thinking of how to write a cool indie movie, i try to think on how to validate my own life, you know, through actual work that might translate into a better society, and with a little luck, i might be confident enough in the power of my own ideas that it will make sense to write something and share it with a few dozen people that might end up reading them!
i know a lot of the stuff i just wrote is very obvious to some people, and i also know this is not a fucking blog, but i just wanted to remind everyone here how important this site is in staying honest about a lot of things , keeping healthy about criticism and opinions, and liking movies for the right reasons