I don't have cable, so this is what I watch:
WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER: See my gushing post elsewhere. Just wonderful.
WINDTALKERS: I turned it off an hour in. What a total piece of fucking garbage. What the hell happened to John Woo? Oh, that's right, he's a sell-out whore.
UNFAITHFUL: Diane Lane is hot. Richard Gere murdering people w/ snow globes is not. What a ludicrous turn to take in the movie. Blah.
THE UNTOUCHABLES: Loved it when I was a kid, hadn't watched it in a really long time. And wow, Kevin Costner was really bad in this movie. Some of his line delivery is sooooooo horrendous. "Didn't you hear what I said? What is this, a game?" Despite the haggard acting, a lot of things still hold up, namely DePalma's stylistic flourishes and Connery's performance. And how could you not love DeNiro's baseball speech? It's movies like this that remind me that DePalma's better as a hired gun and not as the originator of his material.
INTERNAL AFFAIRS: Lord knows why I picked this up. My dad always mentioned to me that Richard Gere was a 'good bad guy' in this, so why not? The movie is rehashed-by-the-numbers Hollywood cop-storytelling, and surprisingly enough, written by Henry Bean and directed by Mike Figgis. Where the movie almost succeeds is taking the 'affairs' part of the title literally. The story is very sexual, and the dialogue even more so (some of Gere's dialogue would make Howard Stern blush). Andy Garcia is a hot-headed Latin, married and monogamous, Gere's a whore, will fuck anything on two-legs, and has more kids than fingers. And Gere wants to fuck Garcia's wife, just to teach him a lesson. If the cop story had been dialed down a bit, the sexual politics upped a couple notches, the story might have actually been something interesting.
AMERICAN WEDDING: I didn't laugh once, and the not even the prospect of Nikki Ziering's big fake tits could keep me interested.
BLACK HAWK DOWN: First impression in theatres: big thumbs down, too mired in Saving Private Ryan's style and storytelling to take it seriously. Second viewing a few years later: I'm much kinder to it. There's no denying the film is extremely well put together, and it's even harder to deny that the film is pretty entertaining just as a pure action flick. While I might not get all weepy and patriotic, I'll settle for some tight contemporary warfare-action.
RETURNER: Japanese sci-fi/action movie now on dvd. It's basically: Richard Kelly meets Spielberg meets the Matrix. If you see it, you'll get the analogy. Not enough action.
THE HILLS HAVE EYES: Saw it is a kid, liked it. Now I can't even get past how fucking 70's this movie is-- in a bad way. Bad 70's filmmaking, bad 70's acting, bad 70's music, bad 70's everything.