Y'all know that Disney bought up the Indiana Jones rights a few months back, right? So the theory goes that they're going to be making a new bunch of films, just like they are with Star Wars. After Crystal Skull, this got lots of people creaming know, but in my opinion they couldn't fuck it up any worse, so why not. And after all, they did the Young Indiana Jones TV show. Despite choruses of "but... but... Harrison Ford is Indiana Jones," there's also been an increased consensus that what worked for James Bond could work for Indiana Jones too. I'm not saying it's the most popular view, but I think there's a growing acceptance that it probably will happen. And it could genuinely work.
Anywho, the Daily Star (bottom of the barrel British tabloid) today reports that the new Indiana Jones could in fact be.... Robert Pattison.
Now, rest assure ye doubters, this will almost certainly not happen. Expect a long and torturous road to official casting just as with Star Wars. And they haven't even officially announced another Indiana Jones movie yet. But you know it's going to happen eventually. Surely within the next five years. And rebooting with a younger Dr. Jones seems like the obvious choice if they're going to recast anyway - and especially after the horrendous debacle that was Crystal Skull.
It's not going to be Robert Pattison. I don't think there's anyway in hell. But you know what? If it was him, I'd be willing to give him a shot. I still think the guy has some potential. Between him and Zach Effron, it seems Pattison is probably the one who has the potential to actually go the distance.
But you know who I think could be awesome? Taylor Kitsch. He's got the charm, the comedic sensibility, yada yada yada. Plus Disney really owe him one after fucking up John Carter.
At least Shia's name is nowhere near this, right???